Dance in the Rain

Healing In Heaven

2011-09-26T11:38:00.001-07:00

Dearest Friends and Family, not the final post I ever wanted to write to this blog. My sweet sister passed away early Saturday morning, after an amazing and courageous battle with complications from the fungal infection. No more pain, no more suffering, just sweet peace is hers now as she has the ultimate dance with Jesus.

Many have said that she has left a legacy, but that is only partially true.... She LIVED her legacy first during every day of this long journey. Every setback and every victory she handled with grace. Never a complaint.

I can remember a couple years ago when my sister said she dreamed of the day of reporting that there was no cancer. At that time her chemo and allo stem cell transplant were not successful, and she SO longed for this dream. God gave her that miracle, and I witnessed her joy as she was able to share again and again of these things that God did in her life. What a miracle she will ALWAYS be!!!

Please remember her own words that she wrote on this blog a couple years ago, expressing her own peace that no matter what, everything would be fine and she would be healed...

"In our college chapel, I used to sit and look around at the beautiful and enormous stained glass windows. I like to believe that is what my life is like. While I sometimes see just one speck of it...perhaps one color that is not even that attractive by itself...Jesus knows there is so much more than that. He sees it all... the magnificent beauty and wholeness that He longs for me to experience. Friends, whether on this earth or in heaven....I know I will be healed. I would like for it to be here...but no one can take that truth away from me. I love it....I love knowing that even when I feel a rug of hope has been pulled out from under me, Jesus is still holding me."

You are so right, Sweet Sister, you did receive your healing and Jesus is holding you now. We will forever hold in our hearts our every blessed memory of you...your smile, your beauty, your grace. We are all challenged to live better lives because of you. We will carry you with us in our hearts always. Three sisters we will always be. Love you FOREVER.

update on melissa.....part two

2011-08-31T22:12:00.000-07:00

please pray as melissa has been put on ventilator. her medical team thought it best to do temporarily to give her body a rest as she was breathing too hard and fast. this was a proactive step rather than a reactive one. pray this works for her and that she gains strength. also, pray that she will have great success breathing indepedently when the medical team feels she is ready to be weaned off ventilator. thanks, friends.

michelle

update on melissa.....baby step improvements

2011-08-31T21:57:00.000-07:00

i've always loved the signs that say "you are here" and let me know where i need to go or remind me where i don't. just the other day, i helped an elderly couple who had gotten lost while leaving the simon cancer center in indianapolis. i saw one of the signs and pointed it out to them. "we are here" , i told them. immediately, i saw a look of relief on their faces. they had been lost, but now had a better sense of direction. another one of my fave signs is in chicago. i have seen it many a windy day there. "you are here" and it always lets me know which way on michigan will make me the happiest=). probably, my most favorite "you are here" sign is on nantucket. "you are here", i read one summer day. i found out just how far i was from france, new york city, martha's vineyard, and some other fun places. when i saw the sign in the hospital....."you are here" , i was reminded of melissa's situation and where we're at with it. if we could make one of those signs, i imagine it would of course, tell us first where we are presently. i think it would also show where we've been, and more than anything, i hope it would show where we want to be.

many of you have called, emailed, messaged, written for an update on melissa. i will do my best to catch you up. first of all, she has come a long way!!! and, at the same time, she is still a very sick young woman.

a week before last her blood gasses were dangerously high, doug was faced with the decision that she might need to be intubated. i say doug was faced with the decision as melissa was pretty much out of it at this point. she was not in a coma, but was not alert and was extremely confused. i didn't realize(thankfully) at the time how serious being put on a ventilator would be for her. bascially, for one in her condition, going on the vent would most likely mean never being able to come off the vent. bless doug's heart as he was faced with "living will" type decisions. i only tell you this to let you know where we've been and how far we've come.

it was during this decision making time melissa out of nowhere became very alert. she told doug and their pastor/friend that she wanted to pray. i think it was assumed that one of them would pray for melissa. but, no, doug said melissa prayed the most beautiful prayer he had ever heard in his life. she did so eloquently and with complete clarity of mind. she asked for wisdom and guidance for her and doug, along with the medical team. AMAZING!!!

the following week(just last week), we began to see less confusion and clearer thinking on her part. i was able to take off work and spent all last week with her in the hospital. while she was more alert, she was still so terribly weak. she has been basically bedridden for 5 weeks, with trips to the bedside commode completely wearing her out.

jenn and i count it our privlege and honor to spend any time with her we can. however, it is heartbreaking to see her so weak and frail. due to her limited breathing/lung volume, she is very short of breath, making it harder for her to talk. i would save my tears for the elevator or times when she was asleep. i would rub her legs and feet and just pray that there would be some way that i could draw the suffering from her into myself. being with her is always a blessing though. through it all, she has kept that same sweet, beautiful smile and i have yet to hear her complain.

so.....where she is now.....doug said that she is making baby step improvements and that is just fine with us!!! any step, however small, in the right direction is a beautiful thing. she is still battling the asprygillis. i learned long ago to NEVER google anything regarding her illness. it can be overwhelming and discouraging. however, if you were to look at asprygillis occuring within a stem cell transplant recipient, the odds are a bit daunting. but we don't go by the odds, we are standing on faith!!!

her medical team feels that the asprygillis is responding to the antifungal antibiotics, not so much that it has decreased but that it has not spread. she is able to sit up in a bedside chair for up to thirty minutes at a time. she has currently been fever free for forty-eight hours.

i asked doug ways that you can pray and he said, "perseverance to push herself, allowing her to gain strength, not to feel overwhelmed, but peace instead, and for the treatment to continue to be effective." she has struggled more recently with anxiety. i am sure some of it is due to the difficulty in her breathing. the anxiety is heavier at night and causes her to not sleep. if you ever wake in the night and think of her, say a prayer that she will rest well. please pray that her lung volume/capacity will increase and that her blood gasses will stay at the appropriate levels.

while we still have a long way to go, wow, we have come so far!!! i want to thank so many for their cards, phone calls, prepared food, messages, home visits, watching the kids, and oh, so many pastors for calling on us and being available all hours of the day and night. most importantly, we thank you for your love and prayers. it carries us through.

continue to remember doug, who deserves to be husband of the year, caleb, lauren, and little audrey. melissa longs to be home with them and cannot wait for that reunion.

you really get to know just about everybody in the bone marrow unit. it really has a sense of family. i like that. we come and go. we're recognized and we recognize others. the other morning, as i was scrubbing in before entering her room, i saw a new face. it was a precious cleaning lady. she said, "you have got be her sister." with pride, i told her that i was. she then said, " i bet you're the older sister. i can tell by the way you care for her." well, any pride i had about my age and who looks the youngest among us sisters went out the window!!! i said, "yes, i am. i am the oldest and i always will be." i could not have been more proud to be melissa's or jenn's big sister at that moment. i walked into her room with an extra pep in my step, ready to be what she needed from me that day. i love you, little miss!!! your big sister wants you home!!!

"it is through adversity that we come to know god, his promises, his faithfulness....how else can we take joy in tribulations? knowing this, he is there with us...in the midst of the fire...holding us in his dance and singing over us." i love zephaniah 3:17 !!!

michelle

GOOD NEWS!!!

2011-08-14T20:35:00.000-07:00

I found out good news today! The MRI results showed that the infection is NOT in her brain!!! That is WONDERFUL news!!!! More update....her condition has plateaued, so it is at least not getting worse right now. Her infection is in both lungs, so she has been given new antifungals. Please pray that those help her fight this infection off! She still has spiking fevers, but they are happening a little less often.

Thank you SO MUCH for your prayers for her! And THANK YOU, GOD, for this news!!

Time to Rally Again!!!

2011-08-12T22:45:00.000-07:00

Looking back, I can't believe it's been over a year since we have updated Melissa's blog. I could not possibly just skip right over this past year without saying how a dream came true for my sister....During this past year, she was able to announce AMAZING news from her PET scans....again, and again, and again. Her stem cell transplanst using a cord blood donor has been successful at fighting the lymphoma.... and we have all jumped for joy, sang and shouted our thanks to God for doing this miracle in her life!

Since then, at the end of July another PET scan detected a suspicious area within her chest cavity. A biopsy confirmed that it was a fungal infection and not cancer. While we are THRILLED it is not recurrent cancer, we know that these infections in post-transplant patients who have incredibly low immunities can be just as serious. She has been in the hospital ever since and has been given antibiotics, etc...

Now HERE'S where I need you to pray--

Recently, the medical staff has been thinking that the fungal infection has spread to an area on her other lung as well as possibly her brain. She is displaying a lot of confusion. They are running some tests that will give answers to this.

PLEASE, please pray that:
1) this is not the case
2) the antibiotics and antifungal medications will be effective in kicking the infections that are there.
3)Please also pray for strength and peace for Doug and all of us while we wait this out.

Please help me rally around my sister in prayer right now about this. We have been so grateful for your support for our family in the past years, and I thank you again for all your support and prayers now.

Love to each of you...

Jenn

Best News EVER!!!

2010-07-27T19:33:00.001-07:00

Wow, what an honor to get to share this news with you!

As you already know, my sister had her 6 month follow-up PET scan today. Sometimes it takes a day or two for results to come back, and sometimes not...

Today, the nurse came in to tell Miss her regular blood work results, and then said, "We won't need to contact you later about the PET scan results, because we have them now."

THEN she proceded to say....

"It's good news..." Miss gasped, got a huge smile, and just waited for her to finish...

"No recurrent disease..."

The nurse immediately had tears too, as did Miss and myself. Nothing less than a MIRACLE, everyone!! We have been thanking our Heavenly Father non-stop since hearing this this AMAZING news!

To literally walk beside her, as many of you have also, and to see her go from ground zero in the worst of times to this is SUCH an awe-filled, life-changing, God-praising moment....words just cannot adequately describe...

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, Lord, for being the awesome God that you are....during not only the best of times, but ALL the time. THANK YOU for nudging some awesome parents out there to donate their baby's cord blood. THANK YOU for giving my sister another chance at LIFE. THANK YOU for this wonderful news today...and for not only helping us to dance in the rain...but now for allowing us to dance in the rays of the BRILLIANT sun!!

So as you can tell, we've been doing the happy dance all day. Miss is so happy and so exhausted too right now.

THANK YOU ALL for your faithful prayers for her!! As always, words just aren't enough right now.

Love to you all!!!

Jenn

Six Month Scan

2010-07-24T08:15:00.000-07:00

It doesn't seem possible that is has been six months since my transplant. In some ways, the time has passed quickly, while sometimes I feel like much more than six months separates me from the day in January that has potentially saved my life. There have been several times lately that a revelation of some sort has swept over my mind and gripped at my heart, or even perhaps a song I have heard that has made me want to sit down and share with you on the blog. However, I have other little things in my life that I give priority to when I do have a good amount of energy; namely, Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey. :) After tucking them into bed at night, that is about all I want to do at that point, too! Each of these thoughts, revelations, and songs are tucked deep into my heart, so that one day soon I may share some of them with you.

For now, I would like to ask you to surround me in prayer once again as I will have my six month follow-up scan this Tuesday, July 27th. I will arrive at 9:45 and the scan will begin around 10:30. I hope to know the results within the next two to three days after that. I have been continuing to feel better. I am so thankful that the ulcers I had in my mouth have all healed, which is definitely helpful when it comes to trying to eat. Still sifting through what sounds good and what doesn't, but that is all part of this long recovery process. I am trusting God to once again show Himself in a very personal way to me and to the world around me through these days, and specifically the scan and results. His peace continues to carry me.

I want to praise Him for His amazing love, grace, and mercy. I want to be a reflection of all the mighty ways He has shown Himself to me....Iwant to be the hands and feet of Jesus to the world that so many of you have been to me. I love you!

Melissa

happy 10th anniversary, melissa and doug!!!

2010-06-30T21:10:00.000-07:00

on july 1st, 2000, melissa dawn prater married douglas aaron rex. god definitely brought them together!!! today, they celebrate ten years of wedded bliss. happy anniversary, doug and melissa!!! we love you so very much!!!

it's been too long!!!

2010-06-26T21:21:00.000-07:00

it's been too long since we posted here on the blog. please forgive us. we've still just been savoring melissa's good report and enjoying time spent with family. quick update.....she is continuing to do well and is steadily regaining her strength. thank the lord!!! she will have another pet scan three months from her last one, so that will most likely be sometime in august. we so appreciate your continued prayers. wanted to share with you a fabulous picture i received tonight via text. doesn't matter who you're rooting for, you gotta love this pic of melissa(in the ball cap)with her sister in law, rachael, at the reds vs. the indians game tonight in cincinnati!!! when i think of where we were in her journey at this time last year, i am completely overjoyed and thankful to god to see that beautiful smile on her face. don't know what some of you are facing, but want to tell you.....hold on!!! the hill is worth the climb.....the view at the top is amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! god is good.

p.s. the indians lost, but she texted that the dippin dots were great. :)

michelle

Sweet Peace

2010-05-10T19:43:00.000-07:00

Knowing that my PET scan was quickly approaching, I have spent a lot of time praying to be filled again with His sweet peace. He brought it to me in the beginning of this journey, and He has sustained me with it ever since. For over two years now I have relied on that peace and His strength to carry me, and my entire family, through this time. So, once again I was begging Him for renewed peace. No matter what the scan results show us, I know that I wanted to continue trusting Him.

I was filled with a special peace today. My appointments went well, and the scan went smoothly without overwhelming butterflies. I knew He was with me...right beside me while I sat, and carrying me as I walked. My sweet friends....you rallied,and He answered! Praise the Lord!!!!! For the first time after having a PET scan, we have received wonderful news! (And we've never received them on the same day!) The results are so hopeful and encouraging. I realize that I am not totally in the clear....but I believe this to be evidence of the miracle the Lord is working. I know much of the terminology will be confusing, but I thought it would be best for me to cut and paste what the actual report stated. I really like point 3. Oh, there is power in prayer....thank you, Lord! My heart is overwhelmed with praise to Him.

My next appointment is Monday...yes, I have been "promoted" from three appointments a week to two, and now down to one! I will let you know any more details that I learn. I know I still have a long road ahead of me, but I will give Him all the glory for this moment...for this wonderful news....and for the continuing work of a miracle.

The report stated:
1. Stable size and relative metabolism of right apical nodule and right anterior mediastinal mass, which are mildly metabolic, but not more so than the blood pool. These are favored to represent
postinflammatory changes after treatment.

2. Stable size of left lower lobe nodule measuring 7 mm, without increased metabolic activity. This may also represent treated disease or an unrelated infectious or inflammatory process.

3. No convincing evidence of recurrent or metastatic disease within the neck, chest, abdomen or pelvis.

Thank you Jesus for answering prayer and for your sweet peace!

I love you,
Melissa

Motherhood -- The Best Gift Ever!

2010-05-09T09:36:00.001-07:00

Time to Rally!

2010-05-06T19:46:00.000-07:00

This coming Monday, May 10th, a PET scan is scheduled for Miss to show the effectiveness of her stem cell transplant. We can't begin to explain how much your prayers will mean to us for the good news we are expecting from this scan.

I truly believe that greater things are yet to come for my sister and her family. There have been many times throughout this experience where I so wish and want her to feel our every prayer and encouraging word we are breathing for her right now. I have often remembered a particular scene from a movie, either Patriot or Braveheart. There is a scene in which his small, weary army is about to face a troop of giants. They are discouraged and losing hope for the fight. Mel Gibson's character speaks the encouraging words to them, and you can see their hopes again rising as they are filled with the energy to face the giants, and also filled with the knowledge that they will be victorious.

Now while my sister has never seemed to lose hope for this fight, that scene still reminds me of what OUR prayers are doing....surrounding them and lifting them up....reminding them that we are ALL rallying together in this.

That we are all praying and believing that good things are taking place in her body...

and that GREATER things are yet to come, still to be done!

So will you rally together with me now? Will you stand beside me again in prayer for her, believing that the healing is already taking place within her... and thanking God for all the many miracles we have already seen along this way...

Standing with you in prayer!

Her sister,
Jenn

his eye is on the sparrow

2010-04-28T20:19:00.000-07:00

some time ago, this past summer in the month of july, i was staying with melissa and family. jennifer had just been there for awhile and i came after her. it was during this time that i feel we experienced some of the darkest hours with melissa's illness. let me be clear, at no point, did any of us, including melissa, ever cease to feel the constant presence and strength of our heavenly father. however, she was the weakest she had ever been and was experiencing tremendous pain in the area of the cancer. she was basically bedridden. it was so difficult to see her like that. it was during this time that her doctor in indianapolis was not offering too many more options. (this was before she saw the oncologist in new york city and was offered the chance for some wonderful, possibly lifesaving options.)

i remember one night in particular, the children were playing with sparklers in the backyard. they would come up to the master bedroom window and peer in so that she could see them from her bed. she was so terribly sick. it was all i could do to fight back the tears. i am not sharing this with you for pity, but to celebrate the wonders of faith and true joy. i was in her bedroom when i noticed a book on her nightstand entitled "contagious joy." she was basically battling for her life and she was reading "contagious joy". oh, the irony.....but i wasn't surprised at all. she asked for her bible different times, a paper with her handwriting on it fell out and i picked it up. it was dated june 26, 1993. i choked back the tears as i read what she had written years ago, knowing full well that she was living her words out in a way that i am sure she had never imagined.....

matthew 7:24-27
1. true faith needs no feelings to rest upon.
2. especially in matters of greatest importance, human intellect and emotions cannot be trusted.
3. it isn't the sense of god's presence, but the fact of his presence that brings peace.
4. god is not interested in so much that we're comfortable, but that we'll allow him to comfort us.

2 corinthians 1:3
".....god of all comfort....."

"the will of god will never lead you where the grace of god cannot keep you."

i needed that at that moment. i was reminded in her own writing that god was in control though our situation felt so completely out of control. melissa is amazing, but it is only through the lord working in her life and her willingness to be used by him. after reading her words, i had no doubt that he had begun preparing her years ago for what she would face later down the road. i am moved daily by her faithfulness no matter her circumstances or how she is feeling at that moment. god is good!!!

now to bring you up to speed.....as of this past tuesday, melissa was day 89 post transplant. she is doing well overall. the nausea has finally subsided and she is eating better. she has struggled some with neuropathy, a common side effect of the transplant. as a result, she recently has had severe pain in her right foot. this has caused difficulty in walking and simply wearing a shoe. please pray that this condition will improve. her numbers continue to look good. she goes back to see her oncologist on monday, may 3rd. at that time, her 100 day post transplant scan will be scheduled. this scan is critical.....this will allow the doctors to see just how much her cancer was impacted by the transplant. please pray, pray, pray, and pray some more that she will receive wonderful news!!! we appreciate it so very much. god has been so faithful to melissa and our entire family and we give him all the praise for that!!!

one more prayer request, doug and melissa are in need of a live-in nanny starting in june. kristen will be leaving then to get started back to college. we love her and she has been a tremendous help!!! melissa prefers that it be someone in their local area and perhaps, even within their home church. if you know of someone or have any ideas, let us know. it is a bit overwhelming, but we have a peace and know that god has the perfect person for this important job. we would appreciate your prayers as they begin the nanny search.

i want to close with melissa's latest facebook status update. it moved me. it just serves as a reminder to all of us that no matter what any of us may be facing, god is there. he cares. he is faithful. and, he is ever watching over you and me. melissa's words....."i sing because i'm happy. i sing because i'm FREE. for his eye is on the sparrow, and i know he watches me. LOVE THIS SONG! thank you, jesus."

blessings and love to each one of you!!!
michelle

Stomach flu update

2010-04-18T19:51:00.000-07:00

Well, as it turned out, Melissa did end up getting the stomach flu later Friday night. The good news is that even with her very low immunity, she was able to have a quick recovery. Her appetite has returned and she has been doing very well today.

Please pray for our cousin Kristen who has been living with them, taking care of the kids. She has been sick now. Her mother Charlene kindly offered to stay at the Rex household to help with the children while Kristen recovers now.

Hopefully everyone will be on the mend soon!

New Prayer Request

2010-04-16T08:02:00.000-07:00

I just spoke with my sister. Her daughter Lauren had the stomach flu a day or so ago. Our Uncle Dan who has been graciously helping with the kids now has this sickness himself. I believe that Caleb also had this several days ago.

Please just pray that it passes quickly and no one else gets this. PLEASE pray especially that Miss does not get sick. Her immunity is still very low. She is planning to go to my parents house while everyone gets healthy at her home.

We appreciate prayer for that and will keep you posted!

quick answer to prayer!!!

2010-04-08T14:01:00.000-07:00

just got another phone call from melissa.....she was on her way home from the hospital!!! the medical team felt that she did not need to stay at the hospital after all. they felt her situation could be monitored even with her being at home. she is supposed to take in a lot of fluids this evening and then return to the hospital in the morning.

this is great news as i had just been on the phone with a weepy lauren grace who was already missing her momma. i am so happy for melissa and family!!! praise the lord that she can go back home to her family. god is good.

continue to pray that her condition will improve and that her appointment will go well in the morning. if you haven't already, check out the pictures from easter weekend that jenn posted below. it was such a blessing to share that time together as family.

blessings.....
michelle

prayer request.....

2010-04-08T10:42:00.000-07:00

melissa just called me from the hospital. she was there for one of her blood work appointments. all of her numbers are good, meaning that she does not need blood or platelets. however, she is being admitted to the hospital. she has been passing blood clots in her urine. while it has not been too painful or bothersome for her, the medical staff wants to give her fluids and keep a watchful eye on the situation. this is most likely a result of the bk virus, which she was found to have had during her earlier hospital stay.

please keep her in your prayers. pray that she will continue to stay encouraged as she is in the hospital and away from home once again. she was taking the news very well. she told me that she realizes thst this is just a small setback and she will be home quickly. pray for doug and the kids as this was totally unexpected. caleb is on spring break this week and doug had taken off the week to be with the family. it works out really well that doug can be home at this time.

we will keep you posted.....thank you so much for your prayers. we know there is power in prayer!!!

michelle

Our Easter: Celebrating Life

2010-04-07T18:33:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! I have to say that I have missed posting on this blog, but Michelle has been doing an awesome job keeping everyone updated on our sister's progress. Over Easter weekend, my husband and daughter and I were able to visit with my sister Miss and her family. We had such a WONDERFUL time!!! It just flew by way too fast!

I have seen prayer requests posted here, and have heard long-distance how they have been answered....but this past weekend, I was able to see one answered before my eyes. Melissa had been extremely weak and nauseous for days. She was feeling so sick, that food didn't sound so good to her. And she was feeling so weak, that she stayed horizontal in her room much of the time. One evening, we sent out a text requesting prayer about this. As she rested in her bed, we heard a recurring sound. It was the signal of incoming messages on her cell phone, letting her know that the encouragement was rolling in. By the next day, she was out in the living room feeding her neice (my daughter) Lexi a bottle. See the pictures below of the difference! Thanks to the prayers and our Heavenly Father who hears our most simple requests!

Also, I was able to go with my sister to the IU hospital on Monday for her routine bloodwork. They found that her hemoglobin was extremely low at 6.8. (They do not like for it to go below 8.) She received fluids and more blood, and was a new person by the time we left! I can honestly say that I had a blast with her while we were at the hospital! We always manage to have fun, and find the silliest things to laugh about.

As we were at the cancer center at the hospital, I was once again reminded how anyone can fall into this position. There were the young and the old walking nearby who also had this disease. I saw my sister interacting with a friend there, a fellow traveler on this road that I'm sure they would rather not travel. But still, there are here....and they are making the most of it.

Again during this visit, I saw so much grace and peace demonstrated in my sister. I know she would not want me to go on about this as if I am bragging about her...but it is a true testament to that unconditional peace that passes all understanding that our Lord has given her. At one point, I told her that I would trade places with her if I could. She just gave a slight smile and quickly replied, "I wouldn't let ya." That's my Sis.

So this weekend, this past Easter, was about celebrating life...

The life of a risen Savior...

The life of a young baby whose cord blood is giving my sister another chance at life...

The life and breath that we all have, and to not take a moment for granted!!

So grab each moment with those you love! Do not waste a one! We have lots of pictures to share of the many fun moments we shared this weekend. Hope you enjoy them!

Know how much each of you and your prayers are appreciated!!

Love to each of you~ Jenn

We missed you in this picture, Michelle!!!

Caleb James holding his cousin, Alexis Faith

Aunt Miss feeding Lexi early in the visit.

Aunt Miss feeding Lexi in the living room, and feeling much better!

All dressed up for the Easter service!

Little Lexi

Us? Fight? Never!

Sisters!

Never a dull moment!

Easter baskets, and Audrey not wasting time!

Grandma and Lexi watching the Easter egg hunt

with Miss from the inside, looking out.

Ready, set, GO!!!

On the run

Anything in my basket yet?

Are we getting warm yet?

They say I'm getting warmer...

Our Lauren Gracie

Movin' in for the snatch!

Do we see some half-eaten eggs in Audrey's basket? Yes, we do!

Someone discovered how that yummy yolk slips right out of the egg!

you never let go!!!

2010-03-27T21:15:00.000-07:00

well, i must apologize. i am way overdue with an update. melissa was going to do it herself and actually has a post partially written. however, it is difficult at times for her to be on the computer as it tends to give her headaches and cause nausea. so, she told me to go ahead and share a few things with you and she will follow up at a later time.

some good preliminary results.....let me first say that i by no means have any medical background. so, anything i attempt to explain will be in the simplest of terms both for your sake and mine :). after a bone marrow transplant, tests are done to check for seroconversion. this basically mean the process by which the recepient's old stem cells die out and are replaced by the donor's stem cells. in melissa's case, it is the stem cells from the donated cord blood. there could be a few results from this testing at this point in recovery. for instance, only melissa's stem cells could show, there could be a mix of hers and the donor's, or, ideally, only the donor's stem cells would show. well, preliminary test results show only donor cells!!! woohoo. praise the lord!!! this is just awesome news and we are thrilled to share it with you.

an amazing answer to prayer.....while i was in indy with melissa, i would take her to her weekly appointments at the hospital. bless her heart, she has to go three times a week. dependent upon the results of her blood work, it can sometimes mean staying all day receiving platelets, blood, or magnesium among other things. sometimes, and it's great when it happens, she only has to stay for an hour or two. one day, on our way back home after being at the hospital all day, she sweetly said to me, "tell me that i can do this. tell me that i can go to the hospital three times a week." it is just extremely difficult for her emotionally to go there after being there for over 50 days away from the children. of course, i reminded her what she often reminds all of us and that is that the lord will carry her through. he will not let go. i remember her then mentioning something about that one of her biggest concerns would be having to be readmitted in the event of a fever or infection. (she has to check her temperature twice a day. if she has a fever, she is to call the hospital and most likely would have to be admitted.) a short time later, after arriving back home, i went upstairs and rested for awhile. melissa did the same on the lower level of their house. i would not know until later, but at some point, she checked her temperature and she was running a fever. one of her biggest fears seemed to be happening. she immediately called doug, who was on his way home from work. as soon as he arrived home, they prayed together. they prayed specifically that the fever would disappear and that she would not have to go back into the hospital. they agreed to check her temperature again in an hour. they also felt a peace about the entire situation. an hour later, melissa took her temperature and the fever was gone!!! praise the lord!!! this was such an answer to prayer. it was literally a gift to both doug and melissa that she could remain at home that evening and ever since so far. god is so faithful!!!

ways that you can be praying.....continue to pray for her full recovery and complete healing. also, she should be having a pet scan in the next month or so. it has not been scheduled as of yet. this is a critical test, as it will show how her cancer has responded to the bone marrow transplant. we so appreciate your continued prayers!!! words cannot express how much your love and support mean to each of us.

our family has so many opportunities to share about our faith through this storm melissa has faced and for that we are so thankful. just yesterday, i told someone that despite how difficult the last couple years have been, i have never trusted the lord more than i do now. he is good. he is faithful. he never fails. he never lets go. bottom line. end of story. period. i have added a new song by matt redman titled "you never let go". i wanted to close with a few of the lyrics. remember, no matter what you may be facing, god is with you and he will never let go!!!

"even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death
your perfect love is casting out fear
and even when i’m caught in the middle of the storms of this life
i won’t turn back
i know you are near
and i will fear no evil
for my god is with me
and if my god is with me
whom then shall i fear? whom then shall i fear?
oh no, you never let go
through the calm and through the storm
oh no, you never let go
in every high and every low
oh no, you never let go
lord, you never let go of me!!!"

blessings to each of you.....

michelle

brief update

2010-03-18T16:40:00.000-07:00

hey!!! it has been over a week since we've posted an update. just wanted to let you know that melissa is doing well and she will be posting on the blog sometime before the close of the weekend!!! be looking for it.....she will fill you in on some exciting preliminary results, amazing answers to prayer, and ways to continue praying regarding upcoming tests. we love and appreciate each one of you!!!

blessings.....
michelle

it's a beautiful day!!!

2010-03-09T11:52:00.000-08:00

it is wonderful to have melissa back home with her precious family. the children are still basking in the glow of her presence. after we dropped caleb off at afternoon kindergarten, lauren, audrey, and i went to the neighborhood park. while pushing them on the swings, i heard such sweet laughter. i was reminded that all is right again in their world. their momma is home. thank you, heavenly father.

melissa had some blood work this morning. everything is continuing to look good. i do not know her exact count. i believe it is between 3.0 and 4.0. she is resting now and i don't want to disturb her. continue to pray for complete healing and recovery.

blessings.....

michelle

p.s. i am adding another pic from yesterday.....love the love on their faces!!!

the sweetest reunion ever!!!

2010-03-08T14:27:00.000-08:00

coming home!!!!!

2010-03-08T12:45:00.000-08:00

as i type this, melissa is on her way to the house!!! praise the lord for bringing her home!!! kristen (our wonderful cousin and nanny), caleb, lauren, audrey, and i are eagerly watching out all the windows for her. there will be updates and pics to follow soon.

dear family and friends, thank you is not enough for your love and prayers!!! your prayers have brought her home. thank you, thank you, and thank you again!!!

we love all of you so much!!!
michelle

the latest and greatest.....

2010-03-05T20:39:00.000-08:00

well, she didn't get to go home today, but she still has some good news!!! her count was 1.4 on wednesday, 2.6 on thursday, and today her count was 3.1!!! is that awesome or what??!! we are so thankful for the many answered prayers.

the doctors are pleased with the way the areas on her legs are responding to an antibiotic. she is receiving vancomycin intravenously. it cannot be given orally and must be administered this way so it was impossible for her to be treated in outpatient care. she will remain in the hospital over the weekend and most likely go home on monday. i will be headed to indy to help take care of her during her first week at home. i cannot wait to spend some more time with her. what a blessing it is to be the big sister to both her and jenn!!!

she will be having an echo cardiogram done on monday morning. this is fairly standard given the high doses of chemotherapy she has received. this test is performed to ensure that all the valves within her heart are working properly. please pray that the test will go well and the results will be favorable. also, please pray that the condition on her legs will continue to subside.

thank you so much for your continued prayers!!! i feel like i've said that so much, but we truly don't know what we'd do without them. i mean that from the bottom of my heart!!! i will keep you posted on her count and her dismissal from the hospital.

love to each of you.....
michelle

"what i've learned in my life
one thing greater than my strife
is his grasp
so hold fast!!!"

Still Celebrating and a Prayer Request

2010-03-04T12:10:00.000-08:00

What a great text message to get from my sister this morning that her white cell count had doubled from yesterday! We are so amazed, but not surprised about what our God can do!
Thank you for your prayers about that!

I was able to speak with her just a few minutes ago, and she mentioned a new prayer request. Her legs have recently shown some red blotches, that are slightly warm and feel a little sore like a bruise. They want to keep a close eye on that to make sure it's not an infection of some type. Because of that, she will stay in the hospital over the weekend and will hopefully go home in just a couple days. Please pray that these blotches will be nothing and will go away soon!

I want to tell you how good it was to hear her voice today! She has much of her old spunk in her voice now! What a JOY to hear that!!!

Thank you for your continued prayers!

Her Sister,
Jenn

"Be confident in this, that He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it." Phil. 1:6

the girl can jump!!!

2010-03-04T03:55:00.000-08:00

are you ready??!! her white count jumped from 1.4 yesterday to 2.6 this morning!!! thank you, lord!!! happy dance, happy dance, happy dance!!!

going home!!!

2010-03-03T20:49:00.000-08:00

yes, that's what i just said!!! if all continues to go well, melissa will more than likely get to go home on friday!!! she is thrilled. we all are. i will know more details tomorrow and will update the blog. her count was only 1.4 today. however, she could still get to go home as she is a cord blood transplant and it takes the white blood cell count longer to rise in those cases.

i will keep you posted. thank you so much for all of your prayers!!!

god is good!!!
michelle

answered prayer

2010-03-02T20:46:00.000-08:00

thank you for your prayers for melissa. she was actually able to eat today!!! praise the lord!!! she had some breakfast and a little lunch. we are so thankful!!! her nausea seems to be lessening. her count is holding between 1.3 and 1.4. she is back to walking her laps around the unit floor. woohoo!!! her doctors continue to be pleased with her progress. she wants to go home so badly. she asks that you continue to pray that her counts will rise and her strength will increase daily.

thanks to each of you.....
michelle

pray for melissa and doug

2010-02-28T20:32:00.000-08:00

melissa's count continues to hold steady at 1.4. she is still having issues with nausea, diarrhea, and stomach cramps. she is also still struggling with loss of appetite. continue to pray that the medical team will find a resolution to this situation and that she will begin feeling better and stronger as a result.

my heart has been especially heavy for doug today. any time, i am faced personally with a situation that i feel i cannot handle, i immediately think of melissa and doug. i am reminded of the load that they are carrying and the grace in which they do it. i then realize that there is nothing that i cannot face, especially with the lord at my side.

pray specifically for doug as you think of it throughout this week. he is a husband who dearly misses his wife and wants her at home and healthy again. he is a wonderful father to their three children!!! he loves them so much. this week, he took all three(who are ages six and under) out to eat at a local steakhouse. sounds like they had fun. doug is also in the medical field himself. he is a surgeon. he deals with patients who are ill and sometimes dying on a regular basis. he truly has a lot on his plate. pray that the lord will renew his strength, encourage his heart, and give him a fresh hope!!!

love to each of you.....
michelle

rough day.....

2010-02-27T21:00:00.000-08:00

the good news is that melissa's count has climbed to 1.4!!! this is wonderful and we are celebrating it with every fiber of our being. however, melissa has continued to really struggle with severe nausea. therefore, she is still npot able to eat. please, please pray that the nausea will subside!!!

also, please pray for her spirits and that she will continue to be encouraged. i have said many times that i have never once heard her complain or doubt the lord during this entire battle. her trust has remained in the lord and she has been ever hopeful and positive. however, this week will mark over 40 days in the hospital. that in itself would be difficult for the strongest of individuals. the medical staff believe that she is very near the final stretch of her recovery and closer to going home. please pray that her spirits will remain strengthened.

we cannot never thank you enough for your continued prayers for our sweet melissa!!!
michelle

"every time you cross my mind, i break out in exclamations of thanks to god. each exclamation is a trigger to prayer. i find myself praying for you with a glad heart. i am so pleased that you have continued on in this with us, believing and proclaiming god's message, from the day you heard it right up to the present. there has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the god who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day christ jesus appears." philippians 1:3-6(the message)

it's friday!!!

2010-02-26T11:30:00.000-08:00

i apologize for not updating yesterday. my laptop had a virus. so, to fill you in.....wonderful family friend, tara, arrived wednesday evening to stay for a few days. we love and appreciate you. tara!!! on thursday, melissa held on to her count of 1.0. she was able to take a shower and a short walk.

today, her count is 1.1!!! we are so thankful to see this progression and her doctors continue to be pleased. as i have said before, she needs two consecutive days at 2.0, or 2,000, before going home. there are other things as well that the medical staff will want to see before releasing her. for instance, she is still struggling with nausea, loss of appetite, and headaches. these will all have to be resolved in order for her to go home. when i spoke with her last night, she asked that i share with you all two specific prayer requests. she asked that you pray her nausea will diminish and she will be able to eat. she also asked that you pray her strength and mobility will improve. as she had the bk virus and catheter for several days, she was unable to get up or walk. she is having to rebuild her endurance. of course, we know that she can and will!!! she is one determined young lady and her faith is out of this world!!!

tara will be leaving tomorrow afternoon. melissa's mother in law, carolyn, will be arriving to stay for a week with her. doug's parents, harold and carolyn, and his siblings, rachael, james, and sarah are all so wonderful!!! god has blessed melissa with such a strong support system within both her circle of friends and also within her circle of family!!!

melissa had hoped to possibly be home by now. however, her doctors feel she is right on course. i encourage you to continue to send her mail if you would. i know that it would really bring encouragement to her as she is in this final stretch of her stay. her mailing address is the following(no room number is needed):

indiana university medical center
550 university boulevard
bmt unit(5th floor)
attn: melissa rex
indianapolis, in 46202

thanks to each one of you for your love and interest in melissa's story. as i have said before, it is one of great hope. she is an inspiration, even to those of us closest to her. thank you, lord, for melissa. we thank you for the beautiful wife, mother, daughter, granddaughter, sister, niece, and friend that she is. we know that she is your child. continue to wrap your arms of love around her. fill her with a peace that passes all understanding and bring healing to her body. in the precious name of jesus, amen.

michelle

drum roll please.....

2010-02-24T04:40:00.000-08:00

DRUM ROLL PLEASE.....melissa is halfway there!!! her count this morning is 1.0 which is 1,000!!! i am happy and i know it!!! woohoo. thank you, lord!!!

p.s. love these wake up calls from my sister!!!
michelle

tuesday

2010-02-23T20:07:00.000-08:00

we are still thrilled with the good news we received this morning!!! her count is .6!!! thank the lord!!! .6 is equal to 600. she will need to have two consecutive days at 2,000 before going home.

more good news.....the catheter is out!!! melissa is so happy about that. she is still struggling some with effects from the virus, but feels relieved to be free of the catheter. she is taking less of the pain medication and is starting to feel more alert.

we are so thankful for her wonderful friend, susan, who has been with her these last few days!!! you are a blessing to each of us, susan!!!

things to be praying about.....she is still struggling with loss of appetite. please pray that her appetite will increase. the bk virus is possibly still present. please continue to pray that the virus will leave her body or the catheter will have to be placed again. pray that need for the pain medication will lessen. she so badly wants to be free from it and feel like herself. lastly, pray that her white count will continue to increase.

please remember doug and the children--caleb, lauren, and audrey in your prayers. they long to have melissa back home with them!!! and, she definitely wants to be there with them.

thank you for your love and support!!!
michelle

the best wake up call!!!

2010-02-23T04:55:00.000-08:00

melissa called me early this morning. her white blood cell count is now .6!!!!! praise the lord!!!!!

"i lift my eyes unto the hills, where does my strength come from? my help comes from the lord, the maker of heaven and earth." psalms 121: 1&2

even better news!!!

2010-02-22T17:50:00.000-08:00

mom and dad just called me.....when the nurses did some additional blood work and testing today, they learned that melissa's white blood cell count had climbed even higher than this morning!!! it is .5!!! woohoo!!! happy dance!!! thank you, lord!!!

good news!!!

2010-02-22T16:01:00.000-08:00

oh, i am so happy and thankful!!! melissa is doing better. the bk virus appears to be running its course. her urine is clear and there have been no more blood clots in the last twenty-four hours. thank the lord!!! she is still uncomfortable at times, but the medical staff believes the discomfort is actually being caused by the catheter. if all continues to go well, her catheter will be removed in the next day or so. this means that she can be up and walking again soon!!! happy dance!!!

i actually got to talk to her a couple of times today, which was wonderful. she has been sleeping the majority of the time since friday due to the pain medication. it was so good to have a conversation with her. with the virus dissipating, she will be taking less of the pain meds and in turn, she will be more coherent and active.

she is still struggling with nausea and lack of appetite. continue to pray that the nausea will lessen and that she be able to eat. i am sure that being up and more active will help in this situation.

now, for some good news.....her count is back up to .4!!! i am so excited about this, especially considering that she has been fighting a virus. we trust that she will continue to keep progressing and her count will continue its sweet rise. we must trust and be patient.

your prayers are priceless!!!
michelle

....."but let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." james 1:4

sunday evening

2010-02-21T19:52:00.000-08:00

melissa has rested just about the entire day. she is sleeping a lot due to the pain medication she is being given. with all the sleeping and the catheter, she is still not able to be up and therefore, she cannot walk those wonderful laps.

please, please pray that the bk virus will run its course quickly!!! then, she can be off the pain meds and back in her normal routine. also, please pray that her nausea will decrease. she really hasn't been eating too much and does not have much of an appetite.

her count is still holding steady at .3. thank the lord!!! we are just eager to see her beat this virus and for the nausea to dissipate. please join us in praying specifically for this!!! her friend susan arrived tonight to stay a few days with her. what a blessing.

thanks to each of you for your continued thoughts and prayers. it is what carries us through. i received a beautiful prayer from a friend tonight and i wanted to share it with you all.....

"Precious Lord, tonight I am praying for my friend Michelle and her sweet sisters Melissa and Jennifer, sweet Jesus, you know how very much these girls love each other and I do too because I love my baby sisters too, so I am asking that you give them a peace that shortens the distance they feel from one another, grace to face tomorrow and the ability to feel all the love and prayers that are offered for them daily. I claim victory for dear Melissa, cover her with the precious healing blood and allow her to be used by you to help others who suffer, along with the wonderful continued support of her sisters! In the only name we can ask ALL this in, Your Son, Jesus, Amen."

thanks, laura!!! blessings to each of you.....
michelle

saturday update

2010-02-20T19:38:00.000-08:00

well, i left indianapolis today and i so did not want to leave melissa. i will be back soon though. it was just difficult to leave her, but i know that she is in such good hands with the medical staff there. more than that, i know that she is in the mighty arms of a loving heavenly father. i rest in that. our entire family rests in that. melissa rests in that.

okay, now for an update. as you already know, she had a catheter placed to help to relieve her of blood clots that need to be passed. she was also in severe pain and uncomfortable. even with the aid of the catheter, she has episodes of excruciating pain related to this condition.

the medical staff is thinking that this situation is most likely being caused by the bk virus or hemorrhagic cystitis. these are possible complications associated with the bone marrow transplant. just as mouth sores were a risk, this was as well. it is just not seen as often. however, it is just a bump in the road to her recovery. she is being treated for it and like any virus, it will just have to run its course.

her white blood cell count dipped just to .3 from yesterday's .4. this is not alarming at all. in fact, it is something we were told to expect. the recovery process involved in a bone marrow transplant can be a bit of a roller coaster ride. this slight drop could have been caused by the virus she is fighting, but at the same time, it could have happened without it as well. on an extremely positive note, the quality of her count and the neutrophils are looking good!!! praise the lord!!!

with the placement of the catheter, she has not been able to walk her laps. please pray that she will stay strengthened during this time--physically, emotionally, and spiritually. pray also that she will be comfortable and the virus passes quickly. of course, continue to pray for her white blood cell count to continue to rise. she so badly wants to get home to doug and their precious children.

continue to send the mail. it is such an encouragement to her heart and soul. thank you for taking the time to drop her a note. while it may seem small, it is so very meaningful to her. mom is staying the night with her this evening. mom was so excited about it!!! melissa's wonderful friend, susan, arrives for her second stay tomorrow and will leave wednesday. great family friend, tara, arrives wednesday and stays through the weekend with melissa. thank you, lord, for these precious souls we are blessed to call friends. god is so good!!!

i will close now. i miss her so much. i miss holding her hand, laughing with her, praying with her, crying with her, watching movies, eating hospital food, and i even miss my lovely pull-out chair bed. she is simply amazing. her joy and her faith is astounding. i leave her blessed and refreshed spiritually because of her walk during this storm.

thank you beyond words for your continued love and prayers!!!

michelle

"and now, lord, what do i wait for and expect? my hope and expectation are in you." psalms 39:7

friday update

2010-02-19T10:52:00.000-08:00

the catheter is in place. it is doing its job and allowing her to pass the blood clots that were bringing her pain. special thanks again to all the staff here for doing such a marvelous job in caring for melissa!!!

an extra special thanks goes to chanda, melissa, pamela, allison, and dr. robertson for the roles each played in getting the catheter for melissa. my own personal shout out to pamela.....love you, pamela, and your special way you cared for my precious sister while i was here!!!

thank you for your prayers. please continue to pray that melissa will be comfortable and rest well. we do not want to overlook our gratitude for her increasing .4 count!!! thank you, lord.

"in peace i will both lie down and sleep, for you, lord, alone make me dwell in safety and in confidence trust." psalms 4:8

michelle

please pray!!!

2010-02-19T08:11:00.000-08:00

melissa's white blood cell count increased to .4!!! this is so wonderful!!! praise the lord!!! however, she is in excruciating pain related to her bladder function. the medical staff feels it is best to put in a catheter. she is extremely uncomfortable and very nervous. please pray that the lord will calm all her fears and bring comfort to her body!!!

thanks so much!!!
michelle

much better day!!!

2010-02-18T17:56:00.000-08:00

thank you so much for your prayers!!! today has been a wonderfully better day for melissa. thank you, lord. her headache has subsided and the nausea has lessened. the medical staff was able to find a different drug to treat her headaches. special thanks to the unit pharmacist, patrick!!! thank you!!!

the staff here at indiana university medical center and the simon cancer center are outstanding!!! the doctors, nurses, aides, housekeeping, pharmacists, food services, and anyone else i've missed.....you are each amazing. our family rests easier knowing you are part of the team caring for melissa!!! lance armstrong received his treatment here. so, you know they're definitely doing something right.

as i mentioned in the previous post, she was not able to be up much or eat yesterday. so, no laps yesterday or today, as she is gaining back her strength. that is just fine. she will make up for it later. she did, however, have a wonderful breakfast consisting of french toast, scrambled eggs, and canadian bacon. she wasn't able to eat quite all of it. this evening, she was able to take a shower and later enjoy a good dinner.

mom and dad were able to visit with her today. they each enjoyed that time together so much. dad shared scripture with her and had prayer. god blessed us with such wonderful parents!!! doug is visiting with her now as i write this in a family room area outside the unit.

her count stays steady at .3, which is wonderful!!! the doctors continue to be pleased with her progress. they are especially pleased with not only her count, but the quality and variety of the white blood cell count. those new stem cells from that precious cord blood are really doing their job. again, thank you lord!!!

i leave this weekend so i can come back when she is able to go home. i want to be able to help as much as i can at that time. however, i dread leaving. she is such a blessing to me. through all of this ordeal, i have never heard her complain once. ever!!! or, ask "why me??" she has truly changed my perspective on life and my own personal battles. she has such joy and a peace that truly passes all understanding. it is a "god thing".....no doubt about it!!!

"you keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." isaiah 26:3

love and god's peace to each of you.....
michelle

special prayer request!!!

2010-02-17T14:42:00.000-08:00

please pray for melissa. she has had severe nausea and a recurring headache since yesterday. she has not been able to be up much at all or eat. the medical staff is working diligently to find a medication that will aid in this situation. her count has held steady though at .3 which is good. i love her so much. i would just like to trade places with her right now. thank you for your love and prayers!

michelle

9 laps and a .3 white blood cell count!!!

2010-02-15T18:33:00.000-08:00

well, it has certainly been a great day preceded by an even better weekend. i arrived here on saturday and uncle dan said his goodbyes and spent saturday evening at doug and melissa's home. he had a wonderful evening with doug and the children by the fireplace, sharing a book that had been pre recorded with melissa's voice reading the story. the children loved it!!!

as you saw in the previous post, doug brought caleb, lauren, and audrey here to the hospital on saturday to visit melissa. they all had such a wonderful visit. at one point, as the children were preparing to leave, it became impossible for melissa to hold back the tears. four-year old lauren came right over to her in the most gentle and maternal way. she reached for her momma's face and said, "it's okay, momma. don't cry, we're praying for you." wow. out of the mouths of babes!!!

melissa and doug enjoyed some time together alone on valentine's day. i returned later and the three of us watched a movie together. she walked 8 laps with doug on sunday, after having walked 7 laps with uncle dan the day before. and, guess what??!! she walked 9 laps today and let me tag along. 18 laps is the equivalent to one mile. so, today, she walked 1/2 a mile!!! woohoo!!! there is nothing like walking arm in arm with my sister or massaging her feet. we're often asked by the staff about how many siblings we have, do we have any brothers, etc. we reply that there are three of us girls, we are each very close to one another, and we can't imagine it being any other way. as jenn once said, it seems the three of us sisters have always been and the three of us sisters will always be!!! thank god for my sisters.

now, for the really good news.....her white blood cell count was .3 today. praise the lord!!! on saturday, it was .2, which is just where it is able to be measured again after bottoming out. on sunday, it dipped below .2, which is basically zero. but, today, it bounced back up to a high of .3, which means 300. we are often asked what it will have to be before she can go home. it will have to measure 2,000 for two consecutive days. that may seem a long way off, but it can be a faster and steadier climb than one might think. for instance, once she reaches .9, the next increase will be 1,000!!! of course, there will be some bumps along the way. the doctors continue to be pleased with her progress. we just thank the lord for carrying her this far through the process.

melissa is just falling asleep now as i write this, but she wanted me to share about the childrens' day. there was no school as it was presidents' day. caleb and lauren got to go to work with their daddy. the office staff just loves them and, of course, the children love being there. little audrey spent the day with our parents, where she put on a "small" concert. mom said that she reached the highest note at the ending of each song at which point mom and dad would know to applaud. she would then say, "one more." mom said there were probably about 30 songs!!! haha. oh, the love of grandparents.

i will close now and hope to give you an update tomorrow of another increase in her counts. always remember that god is faithful no matter what mountain you are facing, he will see you through!!!

love each one of you.....
michelle

Little Visitors Bring Big Love

2010-02-13T17:47:00.000-08:00

I wanted to share my wonderful blessing that I received today. I have three beautiful children whom I love and adore with all of my heart, mind, and soul. I have been missing them terribly. Skyping with the web cam has been so fun, but I longed to hold them, kiss them, and just look into their young and captivating eyes. If you haven't guessed, they came for a much anticipated visit today! I was like a little girl waiting to open up her Christmas gifts....only this moment almost took my breath away....the smile on my face will show you the love that filled my room. (More updates on me will be written later, but tonight, this is so much more important.)

the kids are coming!!!

2010-02-12T19:38:00.000-08:00

great news!!! melissa gets to see the kids!!! caleb, lauren, and audrey will be coming to see melissa sometime tomorrow. happy dance!!! she is so excited and i know they are too. they will be coming to the hospital with doug. what a sweet reunion that will be.

i arrive at the hospital tomorrow for a one week stay. i cannot wait to see her!!! uncle dan will be headed back to columbus. he and melissa have enjoyed their time together so much.

thanks for your continued prayers!!! she is still enjoying the mail. i will give an update after i see her tomorrow.

michelle

p.s. in case you're wondering, yes, she did walk six laps today!!! woohoo!!! six laps!!! she laughed with me on the phone today and said that she is feeling pressure now to do better than the day before since i am posting it on the blog. haha. i told her there is no pressure whatsoever, but she'll need to start jogging when i arrive. wink, wink. seriously, it's just such an encouragement for all of us to see her strength increasing. god is so good!!!

five laps!!!

2010-02-11T19:27:00.000-08:00

well, things were so much better today than last night. i want to thank each you for your prayers. the severe restlessness that melissa experienced in her legs and throughout her body was replaced with god's peace and a restful night's sleep. thank you, lord!!!(it was later found to be a reaction to a drug she was given.)

she woke this morning feeling much better. yesterday she received platelets and today she received blood. i know that she felt strengthened by that. she enjoyed a visit with mom and later with her former "roomie", our cousin charlene, and her husband, greg.

today, she walked five laps. that's right.....five laps!!! woohoo, little miss, we are so proud of you!!! i know her three biggest inspirations aid her in that walk.....caleb james, lauren grace, and little audrey jane. they definitely inspire her and give her the will to push for that fifth lap, i just know.

last night, when she was feeling so restless and was literally in tears, what did she want to bring her comfort?? god's word. there is nothing better to calm and soothe a weary soul. i would've loved to have been there to share in that moment when uncle dan read selected scriptures that have been mailed to her and have meant so much during this time. the three of us girls have been so incredibly blessed to have uncle dan in our lives. i know that he was an extra special blessing last night.

a wonderful friend messaged me a portion of her beth moore bible study yesterday. it was so fitting for melissa and she wanted to share it with me. i will close with it and i hope it touches you in the way that it touched me. thanks, joanne!!!

"hebrews 4:12 tells us god's word is alive and powerful and so sharp that it divides soul and spirit, joints and marrow. the most dramatic "cure" for certain cancers is a bone marrow transplant. god's word is meant to get all the way into our bones, curing our character sicknesses with the most dramatic of all marrow transplants. christ is our donor. a perfect match for all infirmed."

blessings.....
michelle

wednesday.....another four laps!!!

2010-02-10T15:20:00.000-08:00

well, she did it again!!! she walked four laps around the unit floor again today!!! we are so proud of her and so excited about her continued progress. we give all the praise to god!!! he is so good. no matter the circumstance, he is faithful to see us through.

i just called the hospital and uncle dan said she was having difficulty with what can best be described as "restless leg syndrome." it is a side effect of one of the medications used and it happened with her first transplant as well. it would be uncomfortable for anyone, but imagine being weak and pretty much bedridden and feeling that way. please pray specifically about this sensation in her legs. pray that any discomfort or anxiety will be eased and that she will have an evening of peace and rest. she asked that uncle dan read some scriptures to her that she had taped on her wall. what a blessing!!!

she and uncle dan have truly enjoyed this time together. i don't think he is looking forward to leaving on saturday. i will be taking his place. i am so excited!!! i will update again tomorrow. thank you for your continued prayers.

michelle

woohoo!!!

2010-02-09T07:58:00.000-08:00

melissa just walked four laps around the transplant unit floor this morning!!! not one, not two, not three, but FOUR LAPS!!! praise the lord!!! woohoo!!! what a great start to the day.

thank you, lord. you do give power to the faint and weary, and to melissa who has no might- you increase her strength causing it to multiply and making it to abound. (taken from yesterday's verse isaiah 40:29)

monday update

2010-02-08T16:33:00.000-08:00

i must first send out a congrats to the saints, even though we so badly wanted to see the colts win. drew brees was truly amazing!!!

speaking of amazing, melissa has had a pretty amazing day herself. she walked three laps today through the unit floor with Mom and Uncle Dan alongside her!!! woohoo!!! she was even then able to take a quick shower. after which, she was exhausted. but, we praise the lord as he is increasing her strength slowly each day. thank you, lord.

she wanted me to give a big shout out to all the nursing staff in the bone marrow transplant unit!!! you are each so wonderfully good to her. she thanks you for your love and care. our entire family thanks you!!!

continue to pray for her strength to increase. we are still waiting to see her white blood cell count begin to rise. with the type of transplant she had, it takes a bit longer to see that initial increase, but it will happen. as i mentioned before, her doctor is pleased with her progress.

"he gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might he increases strength causing it to multiply and making it to abound." isaiah 40:29

super bowl sunday!!!

2010-02-07T16:13:00.000-08:00

as i write this, uncle dan and melissa are watching the super bowl. i would never forgive myself if i didn't say, "GO COLTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

she has had a good day. she ate a good breakfast and then walked two, not just one, laps around the unit floor. doug was able to visit this afternoon. caleb and audrey are feeling better. so, hopefully, the children will get to visit her soon. woohoo!!!

she is loving the mail and is being uplifted by all of your encouraging words. thank you so much. her doctor is pleased with her progress. he told her that she was a "treasure." of course, we already knew that!!! continue to pray that her strength will increase and her white blood cell count will begin its rise.

she found a song she just loved by jj heller. however, we were unable to locate it on the playlist here on the blog. i wanted to at least share the wonderful lyrics with you. the following was her latest update on facebook: "I just heard this song. I love the words. These last few weeks have been a physical and emotional rollercoaster, but one thing remains the same...He is All I Need."

ALL I NEED

I don't need a thing
My good shepherd brings me all
You are all I need
You let me catch my breath
Even in the valley of death
You are all I need
All I need to be complete is your love
Your blood that covers me

You lift up my head
You provide the wine and bread
You are all I need
There's no need to fear
Even with my enemies here
You are all I need
All I need to be complete is your love
Your blood that covers me

Goodness and mercy are following me
You are all that I need

You make a home for me
With pastures of green as far as I see
You are all I need
All I need to be complete is your love
Your blood that covers me

we cannot thank you enough for your continued prayers, love and support!!!

michelle

thursday evening update

2010-02-04T20:03:00.000-08:00

i haven't been able to really talk to melissa today. she has been resting alot. when i finally did call, the nurse was in the room and she was unable to talk at that time.

her good friend, tara, has been her roomie in the hospital this week. the following was her status update on facebook and i thought i'd share it with you.....

"Nonalcoholic Pina Colada's on Bone Marrow Transplant floor- crazy but true. Better evening for Melissa, the new meds have helped that horrible headache- Praise the Lord!!! Keep praying and sending cards, it's truly amazing to see the wonderful cards and letters that encourage her."

thank the lord and thanks to each one of you for your prayers!!!

special prayer request

2010-02-03T14:37:00.000-08:00

melissa has been suffering from a severe headache, something like a migraine, since last night. if you read this post, please pray for her!!! she is extremely uncomfortable and nauseated. the doctors have tried a few meds, but none have worked so far. she just was given a different one in the last hour or so to try to treat it.

pray that the headache will ease and that she will be able to rest. thanks so much!!!

one week post transplant.....

2010-02-02T16:21:00.000-08:00

good day for melissa. we are ONE WEEK POST TRANSPLANT. she received platelets and blood today. she is extremely weak so hopefully this will strengthen her. she did take a walk through her unit this evening. her spirits are good and gastrointestinal issues are improving some.

melissa asks that you pray for caleb, lauren and audrey. caleb has an ear infection. audrey has an ear infection AND strep. they need to get well so they can visit their momma. she misses them so much and of course, they miss her!!! so far, lauren is not sick and we need to pray that it continues that way.

big shout out to shawna hamilton's first grade class at kirksville elementary, where i work here in kentucky!!! they each made cards for melissa. you cannot even begin to imagine how precious they are. love you, shawna!!!

keep the mail coming!!! it means so much to her and is basically, her only contact with the outside world.

indiana university medical center
550 university boulevard
bmt unit(5th floor)
attn:melissa rex
indianapolis, in 46202

keep praying. keep the faith!!!

"let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful." hebrews 10:23

we love each one of you!!!
michelle

god is good!!!

2010-01-31T18:50:00.000-08:00

just wanted to give you all an update on melissa.....she continues to do well since the transplant. she has been resting better which is a real blessing. she slept well last night and ate a good breakfast this morning. on most days, she has been able to take a walk through the bone marrow transplant unit. she is always amazed at how exhausted she is after doing so, but this is to be expected as she rebuilds her immune system and strength.

today she said a heartfelt goodbye to our wonderful cousin, charlene, who stayed with her in the hospital this past week. they enjoyed their time together. we love you, charlene!!! this evening, melissa's good friend, tara, arrived and will be staying with her this week. what a tremendous blessing to have such support from family and loved ones. i look forward to my turn as roommate to my beautiful sister in a couple weeks.

she has enjoyed having the webcam and skyping with caleb, lauren, and audrey. i am not sure who enjoys it more--melissa or the children. caleb and lauren have been able to visit. audrey has not yet as she has been sick recently.

some answers to prayer and blessings.....she still has not experienced any of the mouth sores that can happen with a transplant. she is resting better at night as i mentioned earlier. her platelets increased today on their own!!! this is wonderful news. thank you, lord. lastly, doug, who is a surgeon and has an hour commute one way each day, will not be on call during the month of february. this will allow him to be with melissa and at home with the children much more. what a blessing. thanks to his peers for allowing this to fall into place.

things to be praying about.....please pray that the gastrointestinal discomfort that she has been experiencing will subside. pray that her white blood cell count will begin to rise as it is bottomed out now, which is to be expected. pray that the lord will continue to strengthen her daily and give her a peace that passes all understanding!!! she misses her children tremendously and simply being at home as a wife and a mother. the lord has brought her great comfort during this time. we will try to give a daily update on melissa, even if it is just a line or two.

thank you beyond words for your continued prayers, your love, and your interest in melissa's story. it is one of great hope and faith. she is such a light for the lord in the hospital. i want to close with a scripture i mailed to her before her transplant. she keeps it near her hospital bed now.

1 peter 5:7 "let him have all your worries and cares, for he is always thinking about you and watching everything that concerns you!!!"

god is good!!!
her sister,

michelle

Specifics To Pray About...

2010-01-27T21:51:00.000-08:00

Melissa has had a pretty rough day today for several reasons. She wanted me to share them with you, so that you could be praying specifically for these things. None of these things are alarming or surprising as we knew these could be possible side effects.

The high dose chemo brings some nasty side effects due to how acidic it is. Her stomach really starts to churn, which later turns into more gastro-intestinal type issues. This happened constantly throughout the day today. Just something that makes it that much harder to feel encouraged when you're dealing with that all day.

Also, we are praying that the really nasty mouth sores stay away. Those would also be a result of the chemo.

Lastly, and this is not related to chemo side effects. Her heart has been aching today to be at home with her children. One has been sick with a cough, so it sounds like it may be risky to see them or at least that one in person now. I know you already know this, but she is SUCH a good mother, and she just misses her little loves so much.

If you could pray specifically about these things, I know she would really appreciate it.

THANK YOU for your continued prayers!!!

Transplant complete!

2010-01-26T17:29:00.001-08:00

I wanted to write a quick update to let all of my sister's prayer warriors know that her transplant went well today. Some of you may remember that last year she experienced a few side effects during the actual procedure itself. This time, there was none of that which we are thankful for! All went well and smoothly.

She appreciated the fact that Pastor Morris and Pastor Jason were both there with Miss and family before the transplant. They laid hands on her and prayed for the healing that we believe will take place just moments before they gave Miss her new stem cells. As Missy described to me on the phone, there was a very happy, peaceful feeling in the room. We thank our Heavenly Father for that!

And I do have to tell you that she said she is LOVING that mail that so many of you have sent already! It sooo brightens her day to hear encouragment from all of you, so THANK YOU for that!

Please pray that those stem cells will settle exactly where they need to be to take over and overpower the bad cells. Also, please pray that the side effects from chemo will stay away from her.

We SO appreciate your prayers and appreciate YOU too!!!

Love to all,

Melissa's sister~ Jenn

Hospital Address

2010-01-17T16:43:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone! While I know I am surrounded by the Lord's arms right now, I will be very transparent and tell you I am shaking in my shoes! The anticipation of and preparation for the departure to the hospital is certainly not what I wish anyone to experience. I was able to have a wonderful time with all of my family being with me in church this morning. My beautiful sisters, Jennifer and Michelle were in town for the weekend, along with their husbands (my handsome brother-in-laws Mike and John...didn't want to leave you guys out :). ) I know I was surrounded by so much love. I must admit I was a bit distracted during the last half of the service, since I was able to hold my amazingly adorable niece, Lexi. She is just a bundle of sweet love! To tell you a little about the service though...at one point my sister looked at me and said "Is this service just for you?" I know there are many people carrying heavy burdens right now, but the songs that were chosen for this week were so fitting for me. Thank you Lord for that little reminder through the worship songs and specials today! (And thank you, Aaron Baker for being a great worship leader!)

So, I wanted to share the wonderful news that I will be able to see my children. We were told they are not quite as tight on the rules (keep it on the down-low) as it appears. That is an answer to many prayers! Please just pray that the visiting times would flow smoothly, and the children would be able to see me at the best times possible for all of us. My wonderful husband also bought web-cams so that we can see each other every day that way, too! I do appreciate modern day technology! Don't understand it all....but so appreciate it!

I also wanted to BEG you to send me mail! I love mail on any given day, but you don't understand the excitement of a nurse carrying cards into my room. That would make me so happy, and I am not being shy about putting that huge hint out there! The address is:

Indiana University Medical Center
550 University Boulevard
BMT Unit (5th floor)
ATTN: Melissa Rex
Indianapolis, IN 46202

If I find out a room number would expediate the delivery, I will definitely let you know!

The next time I write to you, I will be in a different surrounding awaiting a huge event in my life...please continue praying!

All my love,
Melissa

The Much Awaited Update

2010-01-11T10:48:00.000-08:00

I realize I have left you hanging for a very long time. Several people during Christmas time, both at our church and relatives churches, stopped to ask how I was doing and mentioned they knew I hadn't posted any updates for a while. What I didn't expect was for them to remember the exact date I last posted! That, my friends, is accountability and pure love! I even had to read my previous entry to remind myself what I last shared with you. And now here we are, and I have so much to catch you up on!

First, I want to thank the Lord again that I was able to be home with my family for Christmas. I soaked in every minute of it, and loved everything about it. I already love Christmas so much...I get excited about the lights, and the music, and the church plays, and just the celebration of a precious baby that came into the world for ME and YOU! Love it, love it, love it. I loved shopping for the kids...and trying to keep them hidden. Our walk-in closet maybe was breaking some law. Anyway, I am just so thankful to have been here with my family. I also have celebrated another birhtday since I last wrote. Can you believe I'm already 28? I just can't either. (For those who don't know...I'm kidding! I am a young and maybe not always so spry thirty three year old. :)

Do you remember when I last wrote, I told you about my mother's encouraging words of wisdom? She reminded me that God was working out each step of this process. Although I didn't know all of the steps at one time, He would guide me as I needed to go. Well, thus begins the meat of the update today...

Over the last few weeks, I began to long to be able to stay here in Indianapolis for my bone marrow transplant. I couldn't believe I was feeling this way. At one point, Doug and I thought that much of the decision was final. If New York had the "upper hand" in treatment for me, then that is where I would go. I prayed for God to bring us a peace about the decision. I prayed for the strength I would need in being that far away from Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey for so long. I was missing them so much even before I was gone. The thought was beginning to leave an unbelievably empty feeling in my stomach and heart. Little did I know that this was the Lord preparing me. I knew the transplant doctor in New York was reviewing my records, including the results of the most recent PET scan. She presented my case to the transplant team, and soon after I received a call from her.

Perhaps if I was placing my hope in the doctor rather than my Lord, I would have been a bit stunned with her news. Perhaps if my heart hadn't already begun longing and pleading with the Lord to stay here with my family rather than go to New York....I may have been more shaken. But dear friends....God has a way of preparing us for what lies ahead. We do not see it most of the time, and even if we did we wouldn't understand things along they way anyway. He created me....He knows me like no one else....He knew the order of events to take place and where I would be having my transplant long before I did! Wow...I'm glad He's in charge, and I'm not. I have a feeeling I would just mess things up!

So, the transplant doctor was very kind and informed me that they did not feel it would benefit me to come to New York. Perhaps a month before this particular day I would have responded in my mind with a "WHAT?!" On this day, however, I responded in my mind and heart with a "WHOOHOOO!" As the conversation continued and she explained they did not have a suitable protocol nor felt proceeding with a transplant there would be any more beneficial to me than being here in Indy....peace flooded my heart. I had prayed for us to know for certain where I should go, and our answer had come. I did not take this news as another rug pulled out from under me, but rather a huge cozy blanket of clarity put around me. Thank you, Jesus.

After waiting a few weeks for my counts to recover, Doug and I had an appointment with my Indy doctor last Monday. We both left the appointment feeling good and peaceful about everything. I also began some of my work-up testing that day, such as lots and lots of lab work, an EKG and a chest x-ray. I returned Wednesday for an ECHO and pulminary function test. The purpose of all of these tests is to determine that my body is strong enough to endure the transplant and everything that goes with it. I have an allogenic (donor) BMT class tomorrow, and then radiation simulation on Friday. I fear the days are passing too quickly. The planned day of admission is one week from today, Monday, the 18th. I know the first week is very high dose chemo and radiation. I don't have the calendar right in front of me, but I will definitely let you know the actual date of the cord blood transplant. The process itself will be relatively quick. What will take an unknown number of days and weeks is the engraftment process. They are literally trying to replace my immune system with a new one. It is a waiting game to see how quickly these new stem cells will find their place and thrive. So, it could be as few as four weeks, or it could be more.

I want to share some specific ways that you can be praying. First, I'm scared and nervous. Please pray for the Lord to give me more peace than ever before....and strength. Pray for my husband. When he is not working or visiting me, he will be the parent they rely on for all of their mommy and daddy needs. He will be carrying so much on his shoulders. He needs God's strength to pour over him every day. Pray for my cousin Kristen who will be caring for them. This is a huge responsibility for her...pray for strength, patience, and peace for all of us. Of course, pray for my little loves, Caleb (6), Lauren (4), and Audrey (2). Their little lives will no doubt be impacted by this whole process, and not having their mommy at home for so long. PLEASE pray that their lives would be full of so much joy and happiness in spite of what is going on with me right now. Also, I will be learning tomorrow in the allogenic BMT class, if children are able to visit. I am so scared to ask that question, because I may get an answer I cannot swallow. The reason I am uncertain, is because of so many restrictions during the flu season. Pray, pray, pray that they will be allowed to visit.

Prayer requests as far as the physical aspect of the tranplant....pray the chemo and radiation work as effectively as possible. Pray that the stem cells will engraft as quickly as possible. Pray that the yucky side effects such as mouth sores will be kept away once again during the transplant time. This miracle of no mouth sores happened once, and I know it can happen again! Please pray protection from any other infections that could incur during my time there that would slow down the process of healing. I just want the Lord's presence to penetrate that hospital room from the moment I walk into that room to the moment I walk out. If I have ever needed prayer warriors my sweet friends, it is now!

I do hope to be on the computer for updates as much as possible while I'm in the hospital. If I am not feeling up to it, I am sure one of my sisters will keep you posted on everything. I am so thankful to know I have all of you praying for me. I need you right now, and I need my Jesus! This is a scary time, yet I really believe He is going to work in my life like never before....He already is at work. I just pray that His love will shine through me every day....both the really dark ones and the bright!

I love you,
Melissa

Next Step

2009-12-02T11:14:00.000-08:00

My mother recently reminded me of something that I needed to hear. "God will direct your steps...we may not always know the next one ahead of time, but He will guide you." That just really sunk in deep! I thought that by Monday I would know the details of the next few weeks, and the timeline of the transplant and everything leading up to it. Well, I do know a little....but not as much as I thought I would. So, I really needed to hear my Mom's sweet words of wisdom!

Right now, I know that I will be going back in for another round of chemo tomorrow, Thursday, December 3. I will be staying in for three days as I have the previous rounds. This really is a huge answer to prayer....since it takes about three weeks for my counts to fully recover from being knocked down after chemo, this is going to allow me to be HOME FOR CHRISTMAS!!!!! I've known there was a possibility I would be gone for Christmas, if they felt I should go ahead and begin the transplant process. I am sooooo grateful!

I also know that my transplant (of course there are a lot of tests to be done beforehand to make sure my body is strong enough for it) will take place in January. Doug and I will be discussing some things with the doctors, in order to make a decision on where it will take place: New York or Indiana. Both locations are doing cord blood studies, so we will talk with them to discern if either place has any particular steps in the process that would be beneficial for my particular case. At least with this third round of chemo, we will have some extra time to make that decision.

I also would like to add that while I have been typing this, Lauren has been leaning over and kissing my cheek several times. Nothing like sharing good news with you and receiving some of the sweetest kisses in the world!!! Thank you, Lord for your blessings!

Much love to each of you,

Melissa

(April, since I know now how many times you check my blog, I had to acknowledge you and say thank you!!!! :)

Counting on God

2009-11-29T11:41:00.000-08:00

After spending Thanksgiving day with my parents and grandma in Fishers, we were able to travel to Doug's family in northwest Ohio for the weekend. We have had a great time visiting with everyone, and the kids LOVE being able to play with their cousins. I'm so thankful for the wonderfully loving and supportive families that we have.

This morning at Doug's home church (Defiance Church of the Nazarene), we sang a song that I have never heard before. I love it! I even heard Caleb say to Grandma Rex in the kitchen this afternoon, "Hey, I really liked that song "Counting on God" that we sang in church. This warmed my heart! Whether it was the words that he understood or the catchy tune it has, it made me so happy that he liked the song that much. I wanted to share it with you. I love the words....it is perfect for me, and I hope you find it true in your life, too. My favorite line is "the miracle of Christ in me is the mystery that sets me free." I wish I was a songwriter! Love it, love it, love it. I AM COUNTING ON GOD!

(As soon as I know any more details of what step we take next in treatment, I will let you know.)

Please turn your volume on and enjoy the song! Here are the words.

I'm in a fight not physical

And I'm in a war

But not with this world

You are the light that's beautiful

And I want more

I want all that's Yours

Joy unspeakable that won't go away

And just enough strength

To live for today

So I never have to worry

What tomorrow will bring

'Cause my faith is on solid rock

I am counting on God

I am counting on

I am counting on God

I am counting on

I am counting on God

The miracle of Christ in me

Is the mystery that sets me free

I'm nothing like I used to be

Open up your eyes and you'll see

(by Desperation Band)

The Best THANKSGIVING Ever!

2009-11-25T14:32:00.000-08:00

I received a call from my nurse this morning. She had a little extra "pep" in her voice. My heart is overflowing with thanks to the Lord to know that EVERYTHING IS SHRINKING in size and activity levels!!!!!!

Do you know how wonderful it was to receive this news....I KNOW YOU ARE JUMPING UP AND DOWN WITH ME RIGHT NOW! (not suggested for those over 70.)

Thank you, Lord, for yet another piece of refreshing news and renewed hope! I know there is still a long road ahead, but let's give Him the praise for this today!!!

I don't know any more details yet as far as what is next....when and where. I will let you know as soon as I do.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I love you,
Melissa

A Grateful Heart and Wonderful News!

2009-11-23T19:59:00.000-08:00

I know I often find myself saying this to you, but I am so sorry I've let this much time go by without doing any type of a post. During the time since my last round of chemo, I have continued living each day to the fullest with my beautiful family. While I may know that nothing is new during this time, I realize I should let you know that everything is continuing to go as well as expected during the waiting period. Not to mention the fact that my three little kiddos keep me hoppin' through the day, and make it so easy for me to fall straight into bed at night!

I have three main pieces of news that I am so excited to share with you! First, the day of my PET scan has finally arrived. I will be having my scan Tuesday morning (the 24th) at 8:45. To refresh your memory, I have completed the two rounds of chemo that my New York doctor suggested. We are praying, trusting, and believing that the scan will show improvement. If this is the case, there is a very high probability that I will be continuing treatments (chemo or transplant prep) in New York City at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. I have been scared at the thought of being so far away from my children and Doug (who would be with me part of the time), but at the same time scared at the thought of no improvement. I know without a doubt though that giving up the comforts of my own home and a short amount of time with the loves of my life, is so worth the long-term outcome of putting this unwanted disease into remission.

Secondly, I would like to share with you how blessed I am by the bone marrow drive that Mount Vernon Nazarene University held in my honor! ( I am so thankful for each drive that was held in my honor all over the United States! I am eternally grateful to each one of you who headed these up.) My heart is just full of joy and thanks to know that my alma mater would do this for me. There are so many individuals who were involved, but I know that James Smith (dear friend, former class mate, the person who is responsible for Doug and I meeting, and current Admissions Director of the school), Tom West, Kimberly Eades, and ALL of the incredible nursing students....all of these people sacrificed much time and energy to make the drive a reality. THANK YOU! I pray the Lord would bless each of you in an amazing way, as you have been such an amazing blessing to me. I believe there were 400+ people that registered to be donors. I know that many of my friends at MVNU are hoping there is a match for me in that number, but I am also so humbled to think of the many other lives that could be changed forever by these new registrants! I can't wait to see the huge ripple effect this will have. I don't think I have shared this yet on my blog, but there is a young lady that attends Parkview (our previous church in Ohio) who found out she is a match for an eight year old girl! Praise the Lord! Isn't that so exciting?

Side note: The song that is playing first is Love Song for a Savior by Jars of Clay. Writing about MVNU made me want to add it to my song playlist. This was my favorite song my freshman year of college. Listen to the words....it so perfectly summed up my hope for that time in my life. "I want to fall in love with you..." I did, and I still am.

Final piece of news...I was told this past Friday, two things that made my heart skip a beat. First, I am now eligible to participate in a cord blood study in Indy, which does not depend upon any improvement on my PET scan. I know this may be confusing, but to sum it up as simply as possible this means that if there is NO improvement in my scan tomorrow....I still have another option. Thank you, Jesus! I've been wondering where we go from here if nothing has changed. I know that improvement of some kind in the lymphoma is a requirement for the transplant in New York. I was just so happy to hear that I had a plan B! In case you are wondering, I now qualify for this study (cord blood transplant), since I am at least 6 months out from my auto transplant. Okay, now here is the really good news. Are you sitting down? I'm serious...hold onto something, because what I am going to tell you is just incredible. They have found a cord blood match for me...they have found a donor....they have found what I need that may possibly work along with the hands of doctors and grace of God to save my life. It's true. I am feeling a little like it is too good to be true....but it is. I have known they were searching donors as well as cord blood...I never dreamed that the birth of a precious little baby could bring me new life. (How appropriate with the upcoming Christmas season...we have all be given the chance at new life through the gift a precious baby coming to the world!) I am well aware there is a long road ahead. I am not even sure when a transplant will take place. There are so many unknowns that continue to linger, but today I rejoice. Today I am grateful for this news. Today, I am given renewed hope. Thank you, my sweet Lord.

Jesus, I believe in You....I thank you for this gift...and I am praying with every ounce of my being that you can use this for a miracle in my life. I will give you all the praise and honor. I will share my story and your love all the days of my life...

Update

2009-11-06T13:54:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to let you know that Miss is home from the hospital now. She is feeling and sounding much better since she had the bad cough earlier.

Thanks for the prayers!

Prayer request

2009-11-04T19:55:00.000-08:00

All is okay with Melissa, but she ended up getting a fever along with a pretty bad cold that she's had. She was told this is a side effect of the chemo...her low immunity caused by a very low white cell count. She will be in the hospital for a couple days.

The good news is that her chest x-ray came back clear...so no pneumonia. Please pray that her fever will go away, and the cough will leave quickly too.

Thank you!

Chemo Treatment

2009-10-26T17:49:00.001-07:00

Just a quick note to let you know that Melissa is in the hospital receiving the next planned round of this new chemo regimen. She will be there until sometime Wednesday.

On a fun note, she discovered tonight that she could access Facebook on her laptop. This is the first time she's been able to do that during any hospital stay, so that was a fun thing for her to discover. I'm sure she'd love to hear from you on Facebook these next few days.

Also, I am updating the prayer calendar for her for the next couple months. Even if a day looks already loaded up, feel free to add yourself too-- the more, the better! You can choose a date by either commenting on that post on her prayer calendar www.prayformelissa.blogspot.com , or by emailing me at jenniferbergey@yahoo.com.
Let's be in prayer that she will have good news after her next PET scan, and that this chemo is working as we speak!

Thanks so much!!!

Sweet Audrey Jane

2009-10-21T11:39:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday, Audrey!!! It is so hard to believe that two years have passed since Audrey came into this world. God knew we needed her...she is such an incredible blessing. She fills our home with lots of laughter, running feet (usually chasing after big brother and sister, Caleb and Lauren), squeals of happiness, sweet kisses, and big hugs. She is as mischievous as her mommy was as a little girl, although I am guessing Doug contributed a little of that, too. :) You can't leave her in a room alone seeing as how she can climb onto anything and everything. If she does disappear and is quiet too long, you know to find her quickly! Despite the extra fatigue this little girl may cause at times, we just can't imagine our lives without this little beauty! Thank you, Lord, for the precious gift of Audrey Jane. We love you, sweet girl!

I took these pictures this morning. She was soooo happy with her toaster strudel...a special treat for a very special day!

Birthday Celebrations!

2009-10-19T19:06:00.000-07:00

First, let me give you a quick update on what is going on with me. I finished my last 3 day round of chemo on October 2. Other than getting my lab work done twice a week, I have just been resting and recovering over these last three weeks. I have had to go in to receive blood and platelets, which has been a pretty normal routine for me at some point following chemo. I will be returning for round two of this regimen on Monday, October 26th. (May I add how excited I am that I will be home for my wonderful husband's birthday on the 25th? Thank you Jesus!) Following this next round of chemo will be the PET scan (to be scheduled) which will tell us if there has been any improvement. If so, my treatment will most likely be moved to Sloan Kettering in New York. Please continue praying....I am trusting and believing with all of my heart! Overall, I have been feeling very good...again, thank you Jesus!

Now onto the fun birthday celebration pictures! There are no words to describe how grateful I was to be able to prepare for Caleb (Oct. 6th) and Audrey's (Oct. 21st) joint birthday party! It was so much fun! I just loved knowing how much they enjoyed their day. Our children are such a gift to me...to all of us. As I soaked in every minute of the festivities, I kept thanking the Lord that I was able to experience that day with our children.

(Just a side note...I decided it would simplify things this year if I used the same theme for both Caleb and Audrey. Last year, I did have a "boy" room decorated for Caleb, and a girly area for Audrey. I have received some fun-loving ridicule this year that Audrey was being subjected to a solar system theme...which is what Caleb chose. Hey, she's two....and she loves anything right now! I think it was really cute. :) Here is a glimpse of our fun day...

As you will see throughout the pictures, sweet Audrey kept a straight face with the camera that day!

The birthday boy enjoying his pizza

"When's this party gettin' started?"

Lauren sat so sweetly and patiently beside her big brother while he opened every gift.

Caleb and Lauren love their cousin Megan!

...and Madi!

He was so excited to wear this gift to church the next day!

Please notice that mid-way through the party, Audrey wanted to wear this apron. My Grandma made this many years ago...I love Audrey needed to have it on!

Audrey trying out her new Radio Flyer tricycle...and Lauren and Sophie
trying to hitch a ride.

I think Lauren is posing for a senior picture....

Caleb blew out six candles and Audrey blew out two while we sang Happy Birthday.

He is serious about pinata time!

Trying to get a good hold on the bat...

Whoa...this is fun!

A little face painting to top off the day at the Rocket Rally Carnival
at Caleb's school later that evening.

This is a sign of a successful party!

A little hair coloring for Lauren...

...and Caleb.

What a wonderful day!!!

Happy Birthday Caleb James!

2009-10-06T12:22:00.000-07:00

Our sweet little Caleb James turned six years old today! He is so excited about today being his birthday! I know he knows how old he is; however, this morning when I was talking to him about what a big boy he is now that he is six years old...his eyes got really big. It must have sounded so great to him. "Six years old? (Long pause and stare) You're not joking?" Then he proceeded to strut around the living room with a little extra pep in his step! He is such a joy, and we thank the Lord for blessing us with the gift of his life!

Quick Update

2009-10-04T21:01:00.000-07:00

Just a quick update to let you know that Melissa was able to return home Friday night. She is doing well and has been pretty worn out since getting the chemo, so she is doing a lot of resting right now. Thank you for your continued prayers for her!

Jenn

Chemo, Rest, and Quietness

2009-10-01T06:08:00.000-07:00

This morning I woke up by my own desire in my hospital room....I ate a hot breakfast while watching Good Morning America....I didn't have to reheat my coffee three times before getting to drink it...I haven't changed a diaper this morning....and I am not fixing breakfast for my little indians. I know it sounds lovely and perhaps for one day it is a welcomed rest for me, but oh how I missed having Audrey crawl in bed beside me before the sun came up...eating cereal after everyone else is fed and settled....warming my coffee up several times before having the chance to drink it....and last but not least watching Curious George with Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey laying beside me and on top of me on the sofa. I truly believe we may have broken a record for the number of times George has been watched, recorded, and replayed in our home! There is no place like home!

All is going well here. I received a call yesterday morning that a bed was available. After hugs and kisses to Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey, my beautiful mother graciously drove me to the hosptial. She and I were able to enjoy lunch together in my room, while we waited for the "festivities" to begin. (I love the time I am able to spend with my Mom, Dad, and Grandma....thank you for moving here!!!) I have completed one chemo which only took two hours to infuse. The second chemo which takes twenty four hours (I will receive two of these bags), was started very late yesterday evening. I'm so thankful that I've not had any adverse side effects! I am not sure yet if Iwill be able to go home late Friday night, or if it will be pushed to Saturday morning. I am just resting, reading, catching up on phone calls, and enjoying talking with my nurses...and continuing to trust and believe that God has brought me here again for a purpose.

I had a very handsome young man bring me dinner last night! Doug was able to leave work at a very decent time, and we were able to spend the evening together. It really was like a date.... in a hospital room. :) But all of you busy parents out there understand how wonderful it is to have some quiet time together, no matter where it is! I felt like we were being sneaky, because the children were probably anxiously awaiting his arrival at home...they always run to the door when Daddy gets home from work! I know they thoroughly enjoyed their evening, too, though. Kristen (my wonderful cousin who is living with us and helping us with the children) and the kids were invited to our neighbor's house for dinner last night. They just love going to their friends' homes! (Thank you, Debbie.) We are so grateful for all of those who are just putting their arms around us and pouring out their love through so many different ways. I'm also so grateful for those from our Indy First church family who are bringing meals! What a huge blessing!

I read something this morning I wanted to share with you. I love these verses.

Psalm 62:5-8 (New Living Translation)
Let all that I am wait quietly before God,
for my hope is in Him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress where I will not be shaken.
My victory and honor come from God alone.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.
O my people, trust in Him at all times.
Pour out your heart to Him,
for God is our refuge.

About a year ago I heard a song the radio that just summed up my thoughts. I am placing it once again at the top of my play list on the blog. Please have your volume turned on and listen to the words....He is doing something heavenly.

All my love,
Melissa

October

2009-09-30T15:56:00.001-07:00

The prayer calendar is back! Please take a minute to go to that site to sign up for a day to pray for Melissa. We know many of you pray for her every day, but it will be an encouragement to her to visibly see who is covering her in prayer that day.

I already added those of you who I thought wanted certain days continuously. Please tell me if I missed you, or gave you the wrong day.

Right now, she is receiving the first round of a new chemo regimen. Please be praying that this new chemo will prove to be effective in treating her lymphoma. Also, pray for Doug and the kids while she is away this week.

Click here to sign up on her prayer calender! You can either leave a comment or email me at jenniferbergey@yahoo.com

Thank you in advance!

New Chemo

2009-09-29T12:47:00.000-07:00

I am sorry I didn't post this sooner, but I received a call yesterday late afternoon letting me know I will be going in to begin chemo tomorrow (Wednesday). As long as all goes smoothly, I should be coming home on Friday. This is a much shorter regimen than what I've had before, with it just being a two day infusion.

I am so thankful for all of your prayers. You are such a blessing to me and my family!

Melissa

Pure Sweetness

2009-09-27T15:42:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to share a few of my favorite recent photos....

Caleb and Lauren at Conner Prairie

Audrey Jane showing off the newly recovered bench...it belonged to her Great Granny Prater

We have no idea how this happens...Audrey (sometimes Lauren) will wake up with the whole back of her hair in a "teased" state. So funny.

Lauren and her gymnastics buddy, Josh. Is this perhaps a prom pose?

One of the most beautiful sites in the world...

The Official Word

2009-09-26T07:55:00.000-07:00

We finally received the phone call from Dr. Portlock (New York) yesterday afternoon around four o'clock. Talk about relief just to hear something! In a nut shell, the echocardiagram showed that my heart pumping rate is slightly decreased. It is still in the normal range, but it is decreased most likely due to the chemo drugs from the EPOCH regimen I had this summer. So, she is choosing not to proceed with another round of these particular drugs. She is going to have me try two chemo drugs that I have never had before....thank you, Lord, for this option! I am just so happy to know there is something for me to try...perhaps something that will prove to be beneficial!

Okay, as far receiving the treatment in NYC....
I know I had mentioned how emotional I was about this possibility. I had come to a point, after prayer and much optimism and encouragement from my husband, that I realized this was a temporary change for what we trust will be a long term and life changing benefit for our family! So I was very surprised when Dr. Portlock told me I could go through the first two rounds of treatment here in Indianapolis. At that moment there was a rush of sweet relief to know that I wouldn't have to leave my children yet! Oh, thank you, Lord! I asked her if she honestly felt okay about me receiving the chemo here, or if she would rather me be in NYC. She said at this point I might as well receive the first two rounds here, which will be followed by a PET scan. If there are any improvements whatsoever, then I will proceed with further treatments (hopefully leading up to a transplant, dependent on my physical eligibility and finding a donor) in New York under her care. At that point, I would be there for several weeks.

We have prayed, cried, sought the Lord with all of our hearts, and we believe this is the next step we are to take. To the best of my knowledge, I will receive this chemo in the hospital over a few days period. There will be three weeks in between the first and second round. I am not sure exactly how soon after the scan will take place, but Dr. Portlock wants immediate action taken after that, in terms of going to NYC if there are improvements. I cannot tell you how grateful I am to know I will be home for all of the birthdays our family will celebrate in October....Grandma Nellie turns 96 (she is going to out-live us all!), Caleb turns 6, Audrey turns 2, followed by Doug's, my Dad's, and two nieces birthdays!!!!

I plan to talk to my local nurse first thing Monday morning. We are hoping I will begin treatment here as soon as possible. I will let you know for sure when I am going in to the hospital for this round. I know I am surrounded by so many prayers, so much love, and an incredible amount of support...THANK YOU! Don't ever doubt that YOU are making a difference by your prayers and words of encouragement. You are. I love you.

Melissa

Waiting to hear....

2009-09-24T18:57:00.000-07:00

Doug and I returned safely yesterday evening from New York City. Although I wish our trip was under different circumstances, I am so grateful for the time that we were able to spend there. It was refreshing to have three days alone with my husband. He is such an amazing person....my best friend....and my rock.

I didn't post anything sooner because we are actually still waiting to hear the final word from my NY doctor. As of yesterday afternoon, she was still in the midst of a more detailed review of my latest PET scan, as well an echocardiogram that was done yesterday morning before we left. The echo will tell us if my heart has been affected or not from the previous rounds of chemo. Dependent upon these results, we may begin further treatment soon.....in New York City. Yes, that is correct. The thought of carrying out treatment in a city so far away from my home and my family has taken my breath away and caused many tears in the last two days. However, I may have received what I have prayed for: someone who is willing to try something else with me....someone who knows I am not done with this battle.

It is a lot to digest....I still haven't yet. I was expecting to hear from her office today, but unfortunately I did not. I am now just hoping and praying the echo is not showing any results that would keep me from further treatment. The thought of that is scarier than being so far away from home for my treatments. I don't know very many details yet. I will fill you in on so much more after I hear from them tomorrow. I am just praying that the Lord will give me more peace than ever before....we are trusting Him. As hard as this temporary "relocation" for me would be....it could just be what I need at this time.

I wanted to share a picture of my handsome husband and me just before we saw the Lion King on Broadway. Wow....that was amazing. Thank you, Doug, for that special gift!

More details to follow soon!

Much love,

Melissa

New York City here we come...again.

2009-09-17T11:01:00.000-07:00

Last week I learned two things which, I must admit, caused me to feel as though a rug (of hope) had been pulled out from under me. To back up a bit, I need to explain where Seattle was fitting into this picture (for those of you who read the previous post and were waiting for more info on this). I had been informed several months ago that Seattle may be a place that I should look into in terms of an allogenic bone marrow transplant. I believe they do the most allo transplants in the U.S. Flashing forward a bit, I was told a few weeks ago that they had a clinical trial that I may potentially qualify for....meaning I perhaps would be receiving my transplant in Seattle. While the idea initially startled me and brought me to tears, my heart eventually softened to the idea. I am at a point where I will do anything I need to do. I just want to lie down with my arms spread open and say to the medical world, "I am a willing guinea pig....try it."

I am queen of saying and writing what I refer to as "side notes." So here is a quick side note: for anyone who just read that and feels that I am depending more on the medical world that I am on my God....you are mistaken. I have surrendered all that I have to the Lord many times. I am simply trying to do my part and patiently persevere through this with His strength....and in the meantime you better believe that I will try what may be effective in my course of treatment. God has given us knowledge to use for His glory....and praise the Lord for the medical field. Ultimately, I know the Lord is my Healer...my life-sustainer...my eternal hope. I am trusting in Him to heal me....whether miraculously like the woman who touched His robe, or through medical intervention.

So, I was under the assumption that after my PET scan in early September, I would either be proceeding with one of two things. I thought that Doug and I would be making a trip to Seattle for the initial meeting with the doctors to get everything lined up for the transplant (assuming a donor would be found eventually). If we were not able to get an appointment in the near future, I believed I would go in for my third round of the EPOCH chemo regimen. So, here are the two surprises I learned last week from my doctor's office. First, there is not a clinical trial that would be appropriate for me in Seattle at this time. I was disappointed to learn this. I was also told two days later that I could not go in for another round of the chemo, because there were not "significant" enough results. This was very difficult for me to swallow. For those of you who are curious, my doctor feels it would be potentially damaging to my heart, as I have had a high dosage of adriamycin based drugs over the last year. I understand this could be the case. I also refuse to sit down and do nothing. Which brings us back to New York....

After feeling at a bit of a dead end with my local doctor, I contacted the doctor that I saw in May at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center. I received yet another recommendation from Dr. Carol Portlock that I see Dr. Papadopoulos (say it a few times...it gets easier). She is a bone marrow transplant specialist at MSKCC. Doug and I both feel that since I am not going through any treatments right now, this is an opportune time for another visit to New York City. We were really hoping that I would also be able to see Dr. Portlock again while we are there. Before I dialed the phone number to schedule my appointment with Dr. "P", I prayed out loud and asked the Lord that we would be able to see both doctors on this trip. As I spoke with the secretary I said "I know this would be a miracle, but we are hoping to have an appointment with both doctors." I was assuming we would have to wait a day or two in between. I was called back that afternoon, and my miracle had taken place. We are seeing Dr. Portock at ten o'clock Tuesday morning, September 22, followed by Dr. "P" at eleven o'clock. Thank you Jesus! Doug and I will be flying out Monday morning and returning home Wednesday evening.

I don't know what the appointments will bring us. I do feel a peace about returning to New York. We both really like Dr. Portlock and would just like to discuss everything with her. I trust her judgement in wanting us to see the other doctor, too. I don't know if this means a transplant would be taking place in New York when the time comes. We still are waiting for a donor. There are pieces of this puzzle that need to be found yet, but I know with all of my heart that the Lord is leading us.

In our college chapel (MVNU), I used to sit and look around at the beautiful and enormous stained glass windows. I like to believe that is what my life is like. While I sometimes just see one little speck of it....perhaps one color that is not even that attractive by itself....Jesus knows there is so much more than that. He sees it all....the magnificent beauty and wholeness that He longs for me to experience. Friends, whether on this earth or in heaven....I know I will be healed. I would like for it to be here....but no one can take that truth away from me. I love it....I love knowing that even when I feel a rug of hope has been pulled out from under me, Jesus is still holding me. He is never taken my surprise....He knew we would be going to New York again, and I will love Him and trust Him every step of the way! I feel so much better after sharing all of this with you. Please be in fervent prayer for these appointments on Tuesday. Pray that we would know the right questions to ask and for the doctors to be filled with wisdom and insight. Thank you to all of you who faithfully walk this journey with us....I really do love you.

Melissa

Praises First

2009-09-03T19:33:00.000-07:00

I apologize for posting the results of my PET scan so late in the evening, but I know everyone understands my energy is first poured into my precious family. I am sitting here in the corner of my bedroom, while the lights are off and everyone else in the house is asleep. Peace...sweet peace.

Speaking of peace, that is exactly what I have prayed for this week, and exactly what the Lord has given me. Waiting for results is always a bit of a mental and emotional rollercoaster....one which I pray you will never have to ride. However, even in the midst of the wait, the Lord is always faithful to fill my mind and heart with a special peace. This peace is like a gentle whisper in my ear that no matter what happens....He is here. I just have to add something here. I fear that some people who are witnessing me go through this battle against cancer, may question why God doesn't make it go away. Well, I know He could. I know He is omnipotent and omniscient....I know He is bigger than all of this. I honestly don't know why that hasn't happened....but I do know without a doubt that I don't want to stop trusting over something I can't understand. He has given me life....and the promise of a greater life for eternity. I trust Him that He sees the big picture....He is guiding me and molding me through this time. I know without a doubt that He can and will use this to strengthen me....and my prayer is that everyone around me will allow Him to use this to strengthen them as well.

Well, onto the results. My nurse did call me this afternoon. I will choose to share the praises first. Number one big praise is that the lymphoma has not spread to other areas of my body. Thank you, Lord!!! Number two big praise is that the actual size of the tumor has not increased....it has remained stable in size since the last scan in May. Number three big praise is that my counts are recovering on their own. My nurse said again today it is very good that my platelets are going back up. The last time I knew they were in the forty thousands....as of yesterday afternoon my platelets were up to 95,000! Thank you, Lord!!! She also shared that lymphoma is measured in units called SUV's. This is a way of measuring the activity of the lymphoma. Since my last PET scan, this meausurement is showing an increase in activity of the lymphoma. Doug and I are not jolted by this news. We knew when we began the latest chemo regimen in June (suggested by the specialist we saw in New York), that this treatment would serve as a stepping stone in the whole transplant process. I do believe the Lord has used this to keep the lymphoma contained....at least a lot more contained that it may have shown up had we not done anything the last few months. So, I am just thankful that the number of praises out number the one piece of not-so-great news!

As soon as I hear from my nurse again (hopefully tomorrow), I will be letting you know what our next step is. I will then explain how Seattle fits into this picture. If we are able to get an appointment there in the near future, then we will be going there before having another round of chemo. In the meantime....please be praying that a donor will surface soon. I have found myself praying that this person would find me....that I would find them....that God will use this means of medical intervention to heal my body. Please keep praying and believing with me.

I appreciate you so much!

Melissa

Tomorrow Morning

2009-09-01T13:08:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't done a great job recently of updating everyone on how I am doing. Overall since my last week of chemo at the end of July, I have been feeling pretty good. I still feel very tired on some days, and have to just rest and lie down. My lab work has shown that my counts are steadily on the rise, which is what we want to see. Thank you, Lord, for that answer to prayer.

Tomorrow morning I will be having a PET scan. I need to arrive by 8:15 to register, and the scan will follow shortly thereafter. This is the first scan I have had since beginning this chemo regimen in June. We will be learning what progress has been made and how the tumor has changed in the last few months. After we know the results (probably Thursday) we will then be scheduling the next step. I will either go forward with in initial appointment with a doctor in Seattle (Yes, Washington. I promise more details to follow.), or with my third round of the chemo regimen.

Please be praying that peace will continue to fill my heart and saturate our home. We have waited many, many times for results, and I don't think it gets any easier. I am so thankful to know that God is the same steady Rock that He always has been in my life....I am waiting hand in hand with Him.

Much love to you,
Melissa

Good news!

2009-08-23T20:08:00.000-07:00

Her white count looks good and her chest x-ray is clear, so that means no new infection. It is just one of the annoying fevers that creeps in with the lymphoma, but anything 102 degrees or higher always has to be checked out.

The good news is that all this was done at the nearby hospital, and she gets to go home now! My mom gave me the update, but I can only imagine how relieved Miss is that she does not have to endure an unexpected hospital stay!

Thankful for all of you, your prayers and your support!

Please Pray

2009-08-23T17:08:00.000-07:00

I just got a phone call from my sister. Her fever is back with a temperature of 102, so she needs to go get everything checked out. This is a surprise frustration for her as she has been doing so well lately, with lots of energy.

She wanted me to ask that you pray for 2 specific things:

1)That the kids stay settled peacefully as they miss their mother when she is away.

2) That she could possibly receive the necessary antibiotic treatment at the closer hospital she is going to now. Otherwise, she will be admitted to the hospital downtown Indy.

I'm going to throw in a third: Please pray for Miss to have peace of mind and heart as this is an unexpected thing to do.

Thanks in advance for your prayers! I'll let you know as I hear more.

Caleb's First Day of Kindergarten

2009-08-13T13:35:00.000-07:00

I can't believe this day is here! I remember his arrival into this world so clearly. I remember holding him and looking at his perfect little face and thinking...so you're the little boy I've fallen in love with over the past nine months!

Caleb is such a joy and source of happiness for us. He is a wonderful big brother to Lauren and Audrey (with a few exceptions here and there). He has been so extremely excited to begin school. He's had a little extra pep in his step as the day has approached. He and Daddy went shopping for school supplies together last week, and also purchased some needed clothes and shoes for the school year. He is growing like a weed! He was such a chubby baby...he had rolls everywhere! I loved it. His little feet were so chunky and puffy, they looked like they may pop! All of that to say, he is getting tall and is very lean. I affectionately call him a green bean! As much as I dreaded sending him to school, I love seeing his enthusiasm about it. He is just growing up so fast! He will always be my baby boy.

I will end for now before I become too teary to see the page! The pictures will speak for themselves. They were all taken Wednesday, the first day of his afternoon Kindergarten. I take him to school, and then he rides the bus home. (Which is so cute, because the school is basically a hop, skip, and a jump
away from our house!) The bus ride may be the highlight of his little life.

Caleb James....we love you even more today than the first day we held you in our arms! Happy First Day of Kindergarten!

Will You Please Try???

2009-07-28T11:51:00.000-07:00

**Please remember that this is a reposting! While she still needs an immediate match, she has shown many signs of improvement since the symptoms listed below!

I've just found out good news. The cheek-swab test kits are still FREE indefinitely. Just register at the website below to receive your kit in the mail...the more people to register, the more chances to find that life-saving match for my sister.

If you haven't yet, please consider and pass on!!! Many people have even printed this article and handed copies to anyone they know.

Much Appreciation!!!
Where do I even begin? My sister Melissa is in increasing pain from the growing tumor and lymphoma. She sounds weak when I speak to her on the phone...possibly from the pain, or the pain meds, or the lymphoma itself, or a combination of the three. She said she literally feels like she is waiting for a new heart or a new lung....that's what it is like to be dependent on the generosity of donors.

I'm not just trying to encourage you to join the National Bone Marrow Registry because it's a wonderful, humanitarian thing to do.

I'm asking you this because I don't want to lose my sister.

Out of the 7 million people in our country on the registry, only ONE appears right now to be a possible match for her. And that's not even definite yet. Her nurse just told me that yesterday.

THAT is why it's so imporant that I get tons more people to join for her sake right now.

Most people hesitate to become a donor because they think either--
a) it's painful (No pain involved--it's a simple cheek swab.)
b) it's complicated (It's 30 seconds on the internet. We easily spend 30 minutes just here on blogs or email.)

Here is the SIMPLE process:
1) Go to www.marrow.org
2) Click on "Join Registry"
3) It will ask you to agree to terms, give your name, email address, create a password, and give your mailing address.
4) They will mail you a cheek swab kit. You collect the cells and mail it back in.

Once they receive and test your sample, it AUTOMATICALLY goes into the system. Then it is immediately checked to see if it is a match. If you have any questions at all, call 1-800- Marrow2. They are very kind and helpful there. Feel free to message me too.

The registration process usually costs $50 for that initial testing, but is FREE now indefinitely!

There will never be any other cost for you. If you are a match for my sister, her insurance will cover it.

Please take a moment to do this for my sister...
for her husband who is so in love with her...
for her 3 small kids who need their mommy...
for the rest of us, as her family and friends, who want nothing more but to have more years with her.

Thank you BEYOND words...

Jenn

Quick Update

2009-07-25T17:13:00.000-07:00

I was able to go with my sister to her oncology appt this week, and it went well. It was great to hear both the doctor and the nurse say that she has definitely had clinical signs of improvement. Because of the improvement, they recommended that she not wait for the next chemo. She will be going in this coming Monday and will stay through Friday for her chemo treatment. Unfortunately, there is still no donor match yet. For those who recently signed up on the registry, I believe it takes 5-6 weeks for your samples to be tested and entered. So there are a lot more people that will soon be cross-matched with her soon on the registry.

Let's be praying hard for that match!!!

Thank you MORE than words!!!

Lauren Grace turns Four!

2009-07-22T18:48:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share some pictures of our sweet Lauren Grace's birthday party. We had a wonderful time with all of our family. She wanted a mermaid party...specifically an Ariel mermaid party. A mermaid party she had! Thank you, Jesus, for our precious daughter who brings us so much joy and even more laughter!

(The last few pictures show the greatest little performers in the world...Caleb is great on the guitar, Lauren is the lead singer and a dancer, and Audrey is the cutest little tip-toe dancer ever!)

(Please be sure and read the post below. Jennifer gave an update on my latest medical info....and we will learn even more as far as future treatments after my doctor's appointment tomorrow. Thank you for all of your prayers! Melissa)

Some Good Signs and Prayer Requests...

2009-07-22T18:12:00.000-07:00

Since my sister's last chemo treatment in June, she has been showing what I believe are some signs of improvement. It's true that she's not had a CAT scan since then, so we don't know about the big picture. But in the meantime, we want to celebrate these little miracles...

First of all, prior to this last chemo treatment, her platelets were dropping quite a bit. She had to go in often to receive more platelets. They even got as low as 5,000 one time. Since this last chemo regimen, her platelets have steadily gone up...from 16,000 to 22,000 to 26,000 and then almost doubled to 45,000. At the very least, this is showing that her bone marrow is able to produce some good stuff like it's supposed to.

Remember the tremendous amount of pain she was in prior to and during this last chemo? I am SOOO thankful to say that she has no more pain now. She has been on ZERO pain medication for the past week.

Also, she has had a visible, raised-up area on her upper chest that is located over where the main mass is located. Since her last chemo treatment, that raised area is completely gone. Now as I share that, we don't know if the raised area was from fluid or from the tumor itself...but still, we celebrate that even the raised area is not there now.

Please continue to pray...She has had an occassional fever and chills for the past several days. We know that is a typical sign of the lymphoma, so we do not like to see that! Please pray that that symptom will subside for her.

The plan right now is for her to go in for another week of that same chemo the first week of August. And we are of course still hoping that a donor match will happen soon! We know that one match located outside of the U.S. had been asked to give blood for the extensive HLA testing. Hopefully I can get an update on her potential donor soon.

We thank God for these good signs and appreciate your continued prayers that her fever will be gone and that a donor will be matched SOON!!!

Thanks to you ALL!!!

July and August

2009-07-01T22:45:00.000-07:00

Please sign up for dates on Melissa's prayer calendar here.
You can do so by adding a comment under the month that you are signing up for. I already added those I remembered that wanted ongoing days. If I got it wrong or forgot someone, please let me know.

Thanks in advance!

And remember...WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!!

Post-Chemo Update

2009-06-30T22:42:00.000-07:00

Melissa has been home from the hospital for several days now. They gave her about a week of that new chemo regimen, and her medication for the pain continued to do well and be more balanced. Now we wait for a donor for her next transplant.

She is experiencing what I think are common post-chemo symptoms...some occassional nausea and low platelets. We all know that even the simple, seemingly small prayer requests are important too. The low platelets cause her gums to be sore at times, which makes it hard for her to eat. We would appreciate your prayers for her about that.

We have heard that that one person that was found to be an initial match for her has given a blood sample for further match-testing. The matching is so extensive, and I really don't understand it well enough to explain it myself. Although we know this one person is a possibility, please don't let this deter you from still joining the registry!! If this person does not end up being her match, you still could be that for her! She and all of us appreciate SO much the many people that unhesitatingly signed up to become a donor on the registry. And we also appreciated the many people that attempted to sign up, but found out for whatever reason that they were not eligible. THANK YOU ALL for that!!!

We appreciate your continued prayers for her future donor to come quickly!

With much love and appreciation for you all!!!

Jenn

Hospital Update

2009-06-21T16:11:00.000-07:00

Sorry this post has been a long time coming!

My sister was admitted Tuesday into the hospital for the new chemo regimen. These are all drugs that she has had before, but she has never had them all together. This is the combination of drugs that the doctor in NYC suggested.

The first challenge after she was admitted was finding the right dose of pain medication. She says that Tuesday and Wednesday were mostly a groggy blur as she was sleeping most of the time from the pain meds. They seemed to find the right dosage for her, and she was quickly back to her fun self Thursday morning. After she woke up, she jokingly asked how all her visits went the day before.

Her CAT scan did find a lesion of her liver, but it was not found to be of major significance.

The CAT scan also did not show a clear picture for the doctor as to whether the main mass was invading the pericardium or not. They could not see that it was, but could not see that it was not either. An echo was then performed to check on her heart, which confirmed that the mass is not pushing on the heart. Word got around that her heart was definitely being invaded by the mass, which is not a fact...I'm happy to say.

The CAT scan also showed growth of an additional 2 cm of the main mass, to which is what they were attributing her increased pain.

Aside from all the medical jargon now...

She is doing very well! She's been up walking around in the halls quite a lot. Her pain is much more controlled now too. I was able to stay with her in the hospital this week, and we had so much fun as usual. We even had a tornado lockdown to liven things up a little bit Friday night!

Thank you to all of her many visitors...I know it REALLY means a lot to her! She was able to spend some time with her favorite nurses from the BMT unit (you know who you are! :) She was also able to spend time with visiting friends from Dayton as well as here in Indy.

And a HUGE thank you to the MANY of you who have taken the time to register to be a bone marrow/stem cell donor this week. Thank you just isn't even enough for that. We never know who might be her match, but we know God knows already.

And THANK YOU, as always, for being the kind, supportive friends that you are to her and to all of us. Your prayers are priceless!!!

Her sister,
Jenn

Specific Prayer Request

2009-06-08T20:15:00.000-07:00

Just recently, the main mass has been causing my sister more pain lately. Because this mass is located in her chest cavity, she's been feeling the pain through her chest area and upper back. Please pray that the pain lets up for her. It has really been making her uncomfortable lately, which is very challenging with three small children.

Thank you!

Important Dates

2009-06-07T20:52:00.001-07:00

This Wednesday, June 10th, my sister is having her biopsy on the main mass. The sample will be sent to her new doctor at Sloan-Kettering in NYC. They are checking to see if it is definitely the same exact type of lymphoma as the rest of the spots. I imagine it would be a good thing if they could discover a difference. That way, this tumor could possibly be treatable through other means not tried yet.

Her new chemo regimen is scheduled to begin on Tuesday, June 16th. I believe this is the EPOCH chemotherapy. She will be hospitalized during that week at her hospital there in Indy.

We would appreciate your prayers about these events!!!

More Details

2009-06-03T20:19:00.001-07:00

This is a quick update of the options that were given by the doctor at Sloan-Kettering. First of all, a needle-guided biopsy will be done to check on the main mass in her chest. Remembering that this mass seems to be the only area that is nonresponsive, we want to make sure that it is definitely the exact same type of lymphoma as the areas that did respond. This biopsy will tell us that.

There is also another chemo regimen that the doctor suggested. This is known as the EPOCH chemotherapy. I am not certain of the timeline of when this will begin. I would imagine they would need the biopsy results first.

She was also told that she should try the allogenic bone marrow/stem cell transplant after all. This is the transplant that would involve a donor, instead of using her own cells. She has been put back on the list to find a match for this.

Right now, the pressure of these decisions lies in Melissa and Doug deciding where they will go for certain treatments. Under the guidance of the new doctor, her hospital in Indiana could administer the new chemo. The doctor also suggested a couple locations near the west coast that would be good for the transplant. My sister is willing to travel whatever distance is necessary, but that thought is a painful one for her as it would be more time away from the kids.

Please pray for Miss and Doug to have clear direction about each specific location they are to go to. There is obviously a tremendous amount of pressure in that decision, but we know God will lead the way.

Thank you so much for your priceless prayers!!!

Quick Update from Appt

2009-05-26T19:32:00.000-07:00

I spoke with Miss quickly today on the phone this afternoon. She said overall, it's good news...that the new doctor presented some more options that were not tried yet. That is very encouraging to her and Doug and to the rest of us too! We were so relieved to hear that there are more options yet, as that's what we prayed for!

I'll let Miss give you more details when she returns to Indy, so that you get the right facts. Until then, know that we all are SO grateful for your prayers! Also, know that Miss is having an absolute blast in New York City with her husband and friend, Em....lots of fun with shopping and hitting some cool restarants too.

Just realized how even more fitting the song is that's playing now...and I didn't even know she was headed to NYC when I posted that. "Greater things are yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city..."

You'll hear more from her within a couple days!

With love and appreciation!!!

Her sister,
Jenn

A Second Opinion

2009-05-21T19:07:00.000-07:00

Melissa is getting a second opinion at Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center in New York City. The appointment is scheduled for this coming Tuesday at 9 am.

Please pray for wisdom for the new doctors--that these doctors will be able to offer some other options to treat this. Also, please pray for the kids while Miss is away. It is hard on her and them both to be apart from one another.

She and Doug will both be going. She is glad too that she'll get to spend some time with her dear friend Emily while she is on the east coast.

Thanks in advance for your prayers!

Be Encouraged

2009-05-13T20:42:00.001-07:00

I wanted to post this song for my sister. Such encouragement in these words!

"Greater things are still to come. Greater things are yet to be done..."

I believe that!

As you pray, will you dare to believe that with us?

You're the God of this city
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You Are

You're the light in this darkness
You're the hope to the hopeless
You're the peace to the restless
You are

For there is no one like our God
There is no one like You God

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here

You're the Lord of Creation
The Creator of all things
You're the King above all kings
You Are

You're the strength in the weakness
You're the love to the broken
You're the joy in the sadness
You Are

For there is no one like our God
There is no one like You God

For greater things have yet to come
Greater things are still to be done
In this city
When glory shines from hearts alive
With praise for You and love for You
In this city

Greater things have yet to come
Greater things are still to be done
In this city
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here.

Prayer Calendar

2009-05-12T20:15:00.001-07:00

Sign up for the prayer calendar for the remainder of May and June here!!!

I know it will help her to see who is visibly covering her and Doug and the kids in prayer that day. Just leave a comment under that month.

Thank you in advance!!!!!!

With God, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!!!

Praying for a Miracle

2009-05-12T06:22:00.000-07:00

We've heard the words before, but hearing them yesterday rang louder and ran deeper into our hurting hearts: resistant lymphoma. I don't like those words. I don't like that they pertain to my life. I want to live. I want to have more years with my husband and see my beautiful children grow up. I am asking you to pray with us for a miracle. I know...we have all been doing this. At this point, a miracle is what it will take to remove this cancer from my body.

I held it together very well while the doctor was talking to us. I heard every word he said and remember looking in his eyes with a strength that was not my own. I kept thinking...the Lord is right here with us, and I know people are surrounding us with prayer; otherwise, I would have melted. I am so grateful for the presence of the Lord in that room with us.

The only option at this point is to participate in a study. It is not yet known to be effective with lymphoma, but it is also not known to be ineffective. The treatment would not involve chemo drugs, as this has already proven itself ineffective for me. This study uses an immuno-boosting drug in hopes of equipping one's own immune system to build up and fight for itself (those are my words). I will provide more details on this soon.

Please pray hard. Please promise me that you are just as much prayer warriors for Doug, Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey as you are for me. Doug and I are being hit with a possible reality that is more than we know how to process. Please pray that God's peace will literally permeate our hearts, our minds, and the walls of our home.

I still believe, and I still trust.

We love you,
Melissa

Why I Love Being a Mommy

2009-05-10T15:22:00.000-07:00

CAT scan results

2009-05-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

I received a call from my nurse this morning. It's not the greatest news, but I keep telling myself it could be worse. The main mass has grown .9 centimeters. The rest of the areas have remained the same (so while there is no shrinking....they have not grown either). I always try to prepare myself for news like this, but yet I also can't help but think of the possibility of my cancer shrinking or even disappearing. Although I wish the results were different, I can assure you that somehow there is still joy and peace in my heart. I would love to show and tell the world my story after complete healing, but perhaps the bigger impact comes even in the midst of the storm and less than desirable news. God works in mysterious ways, right?

Our appointment with the oncologist is Monday at 1:45 p.m. Please be praying that we would know what direction we are to take next...and just for peace and rest in the meantime. My God is still faithful....He will continue to carry us and make us stronger through this time.

I was blessed to spend the afternoon with one of the sweetest friends in the world. (Thanks Melissa!) She and her son came over for the afternoon so the kids could play and we could talk. Talk about great timing...we had this day planned not knowing what the results would be. The Lord knew just what I needed to lift my spirits and heart!

I will update after Monday with decisions that are made in terms of treatment. I thank you for being a part of my life!

Much love,
Melissa

Three Month Scan

2009-05-04T19:06:00.000-07:00

It does not even seem possible that I will be having my three month scan this Thursday morning. Three months...wow! Although my time in the hospital seemed like some of the longest days of my life, the time that I have been home since the transplant has gone by so quickly! I do have three little blessings to keep me pretty busy. Caleb, Lauren, and Audrey have been the best motivators in the world! I've always said they are my rainbow in this storm.

Over the last several weeks I have felt really good. I am so grateful for the energy and strength that the Lord brings me. I am very eager to have the scan on Thursday. I will arrive at the hospital at 8:50, and the scan will follow shortly thereafter. Please pray for continued peace while we anticipate the scan and also as we wait for the results. Over the last few weeks, I've felt so helpless at times. I am so grateful for the blessing of my family, and the opportunity to live a fulfilling and very happy life whether in the valleys or on the mountaintops. It is difficult though to wait. Whether it is CAT scans or visits to the doctor, I know I will live the rest of my life holding my breath to hear the calming words of relief. I know this means one thing...I will rely on my precious Lord even more for that amazing peace that can only come from Him.

I see life differently now. I wish I had never been diagnosed with cancer. Yet at the same time, I am grateful for the way my eyes have been re-opened....to His grace and mercy, to His sustaining peace, and to the beautiful blessing of the unconditional support of my family and friends. It's almost too personal to even explain. Even without knowing the results of the scan or what lies ahead in the future, I feel I have been given a second chance at life. The chance to rearrange my priorities...to hold my children a little tighter, to kiss them a little more often, to appreciate everything my husband does for our family, to recognize opportunities that God gives me to encourage others walking this same journey...to continue learning and growing from this experience for the rest of my life! However, whenever, whatever, whoever....I am willing to share my story.

I love the song that is playing....I have never heard it before tonight, but He truly is the Keeper of My Heart!

Thank you for blessing me with your love and prayers!
Melissa

Random Pictures

2009-04-06T18:19:00.000-07:00

I wanted to share some pictures with you of the children. I hope they bring a smile to your face! (The first two are of Lauren and Caleb with some of their favorite buddies, Izzy and Eli.)