Thursday, September 3, 2009

Praises First

I apologize for posting the results of my PET scan so late in the evening, but I know everyone understands my energy is first poured into my precious family. I am sitting here in the corner of my bedroom, while the lights are off and everyone else in the house is asleep. Peace...sweet peace.

Speaking of peace, that is exactly what I have prayed for this week, and exactly what the Lord has given me. Waiting for results is always a bit of a mental and emotional which I pray you will never have to ride. However, even in the midst of the wait, the Lord is always faithful to fill my mind and heart with a special peace. This peace is like a gentle whisper in my ear that no matter what happens....He is here. I just have to add something here. I fear that some people who are witnessing me go through this battle against cancer, may question why God doesn't make it go away. Well, I know He could. I know He is omnipotent and omniscient....I know He is bigger than all of this. I honestly don't know why that hasn't happened....but I do know without a doubt that I don't want to stop trusting over something I can't understand. He has given me life....and the promise of a greater life for eternity. I trust Him that He sees the big picture....He is guiding me and molding me through this time. I know without a doubt that He can and will use this to strengthen me....and my prayer is that everyone around me will allow Him to use this to strengthen them as well.

Well, onto the results. My nurse did call me this afternoon. I will choose to share the praises first. Number one big praise is that the lymphoma has not spread to other areas of my body. Thank you, Lord!!! Number two big praise is that the actual size of the tumor has not has remained stable in size since the last scan in May. Number three big praise is that my counts are recovering on their own. My nurse said again today it is very good that my platelets are going back up. The last time I knew they were in the forty of yesterday afternoon my platelets were up to 95,000! Thank you, Lord!!! She also shared that lymphoma is measured in units called SUV's. This is a way of measuring the activity of the lymphoma. Since my last PET scan, this meausurement is showing an increase in activity of the lymphoma. Doug and I are not jolted by this news. We knew when we began the latest chemo regimen in June (suggested by the specialist we saw in New York), that this treatment would serve as a stepping stone in the whole transplant process. I do believe the Lord has used this to keep the lymphoma least a lot more contained that it may have shown up had we not done anything the last few months. So, I am just thankful that the number of praises out number the one piece of not-so-great news!

As soon as I hear from my nurse again (hopefully tomorrow), I will be letting you know what our next step is. I will then explain how Seattle fits into this picture. If we are able to get an appointment there in the near future, then we will be going there before having another round of chemo. In the meantime....please be praying that a donor will surface soon. I have found myself praying that this person would find me....that I would find them....that God will use this means of medical intervention to heal my body. Please keep praying and believing with me.

I appreciate you so much!



Anonymous said...

So glad to hear the good news you reported, Melissa! As I read your blog, I was thinking about something I first felt about 20 years ago. It is me, sitting in a great big hand...kind of like King Kong's. (just so you can picture what I mean). It's God's hand, Melissa. I always think, you know, that big thumb might just come over and smash me. You just never know about things like that. HOWEVER, I will never get out of that matter what happens. It's a choice to trust...just that...that I'm sitting in God's hand and I don't want to be anywhere else. Thought I'd share that picture with you too. By the way, I sent in my little swabs to see if I'm a match. It makes me nervous, but I REALLY would love to be a match for you, girlie!! Love to you and your family! We are praying! Pam Roberts

michelle said...

love you, proud of you and your choice to praise in the midst of this storm!!!

Jessie said...

Your words are beautiful and so encouraging! I'm singing the praises with you!!! So glad for your results!

SentimentsbyDenise said...

Another reminder that God is still God and He is faithful! Praise Him for continuing to work in you and bring glory to Himself through your life!
Melissa - I think of you often, the Lord brings you to my mind so much, and I'm praying for you so very much. May you feel His arms around you, and your family also.

Cramer said...

still praying and I do believe we are going to witness a miracle in you...I already have just watching you go through this and keeping the faith the whole way!

Jess said...

Continued thoughts and prayers!! Praying that a donor is found very soon and for you and you family during that wait.

Jessica said...

Melissa, your faith in the storm is beautiful and inspiring . . . praying for you!!

Jenn said...

Miss, I could not be more proud of you. You've taught me so much through all this. ALWAYS here for you! Love you, Sis!!!

Crystal33 said...

So thrilled to hear the good news! Peace exhudes from you when I see you. I loved reading your Praise the the One who created you! Thank you for being a light to others, during this journey. Love and miss you!

Christa Fisher said...

Hi Missy,

My name is Christa. I randomly ran across your blog when I was looking up the "Dance in the Rain" quote a few weeks ago. Your story and faith have touched my heart in so many ways. I will continue to pray for you that God will give you strength, encouragement, and peace each day. You are also in the prayers of my church, family, friends, and Bible Study. God is so much bigger than ANYTHING we face, and I know that He will continue to hold you in His loving arms. A few months ago, when I was going through a tough time, I wrote a song that God gave me. I thought the chorus might bless you:

Child climb up into My arms,
Just sit for a while,
Here you'll find rest,
I'll give you back your smile.
My yoke is easy,
My burden's light,
I'll show you my love,
Hold you tight,
Oh child, climb up into My arms.

**When I'm feeling down, I just picture myself climbing up into Jesus' arms and letting Him hold me for brings such sweet peace.

God Bless You...Christa Fisher

tbakes0623 said...

My name is Tracy...I'm actually a nurse who used to work with Doug in Dayton when he was a resident. I heard of your blog through work and have truely been touch by your story and most of all your faith. I have prayed for you and your family since hearing your news back when Doug was here and you had you VATS procedure. I just wanted you to know that I think about you and your family often and admire your strength. Praying you find a donor soon!
God Bless You,